


The Becoming

by A_Delicious_Torment



Series: An Inquisitor's Tale [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:00:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25716199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Delicious_Torment/pseuds/A_Delicious_Torment
Summary: It has been a year and a half since the defeat of Corypheus. The Inquisition has been called to the Exalted Council to decide it's fate. Arya Trevelyan has been out of the spot light, traveling the country and helping the people rebuild what was broken, now she must return to Skyhold, muster her forces and decide what is to become.
Relationships: Alistair & Female Inquisitor (Dragon Age), Alistair/Female Amell (Dragon Age), Female Hawke/Isabela/Merrill, Female Inquisitor/Cullen Rutherford, Female Inquisitor/Leliana (Dragon Age), Fenris/Hawke/Isabella (Dragon Age), Iron Bull/Dorian Pavus
Series: An Inquisitor's Tale [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1865173
Comments: 6
Kudos: 5





	1. Next Stage

**Author's Note:**

> This is the second part of Arya Trevelyan's story. If you have not read the first part, this one might be confusing at first. To find the first part search for "In the Eye of the Beholder" or just click on my name and that will bring you to all my works.  
> *Please note that my stories follow the story line but loosely at some points. If going off canon isn't your thing, you might not like my stuff. I encourage comments and even constructive criticisms/debates, just don't be an ass about it. This is a platform for learning and exploring what, "might have been," so keep an open mind as you read through my stuff.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Corypheus has been defeated, Leliana will soon be Divine Victoria, Morrigan is dead, Dorian is on a quest to save his homeland, Hawke and Blackwall are starting a family, Alistair and Solas have disappeared. After a year and a half traveling Thedas with Kieran and Leliana, it is time for Arya to step back into the spot light, she has a young Prince to put on his throne, an Emperor waiting for her answer and an Inquisition to decide the fate of.

* * *

I don’t know the time but I guess early morning, I could hear soft cries that lead me to Ana’s room. This wasn’t the first night I found her like this but this time I went to her side, crawling beneath the warm fur blanket, she pulled me close and kissed my forehead, “I’m sorry for waking you darling,” she cooed.

“Why have you been sad,” I asked, “Where is Ari?”

It had been over a year since the three of us left Skyhold, we’ve been traveling all of Thedas, even went to Minrathous to see Uncle Dorian! But lately, things have been different, Ari and Ana have been more distant from each other and I catch them looking sad when they don’t think anyone is around.

“Worry not child, she will be back shortly,” Ana answered, reaching to ruffle my brown hair.

“Is it almost time for you to leave?” I asked

She pulled me close, taking a deep breath, “It is, we all have our responsibilities, do we not?”

I knew this was coming, Ana was to become the next Divine, she will be kind and compassionate, just as she has been to me but I will miss her and Ari will too.

“Where will we go when you leave?”

“Well, Kieran, you will be going to Denerim, remember when we visited the palace there?”

I did, it was elegant but not as extravagant as when mama and I stayed in Orlais.

“Will I be King already? What if I am not ready?

“You will be Thirteen this year darling, Ari and I have taught you much and we will always be here to support you. You will know your advisor’s well, your Aunt Sybil will be there, and Bull, even Fiona, to help with your magic. Ari and I have to meet a lot of important people to talk about the future of the Inquisition, whether to disband it or keep it going, so we will be going to Halamshirel”

“I hope they decide to disband,” I told her, my eyes welling with tears. I knew she wouldn’t be able to stay but I didn’t want to lose both of them.

Pulling me in close again she kissed my head, “you won’t lose either of us, now go get some rest, we have a big day tomorrow.”

* * *

**Cullen POV**

I hadn’t been to the Anderfels but surely didn’t expect to find what I was seeing. Fields filed with animals and lush grasses stretched for miles, stopped only by the sparkling sea. Purple rose like flowers filled the air with the sweetness of honey. Bees buzzed and birds circled, probably looking for a tasty field mouse.

In the distance, I saw the fortress known as Weisshaupt, base of operations for the Grey Wardens. I was here on Inquisition business, we had taken the Wardens in as allies, but since Corypheus was defeated we haven’t seen much of them. Now, as we prepared for the Exalted Council, it was time to muster our strength and show the world once again the full might if the Inquisition’s army…. Not my idea, but our Ambassador assures me showing our strength is important before the people forget.

In an instant, I was pulled from my thoughts as wing-beats came upon me from behind. Pulling my sword I spun my mount, ready to take on whatever was bearing down on me. I swiped blindly but the creature dodged my attack, knocking me off my horse with it's blow back, I hit the ground hard, stars dancing across my vision before I feel into darkness.

* * *

**Alistair POV**

The morning sun had barely crested the horizon, and here I was surrounded by five adolescent griffons. They looked at me with their creepy, beady eyes, heads moving in that weird jerky way only birds can do. Solona came from behind me carrying a bucket of slop, “Alistair!” she said when she saw me, excitement shining in her sapphire eyes, “I’m taking Duncan on a flying lesson today, want to join?” The first hatchling of this clutch, we named Duncan, after well… Duncan. He was a massive beast, bigger than a horse already and only a couple years old. Since finding the eggs deep under Weisshaupt, Solona and I have been taking care of them. We built them a new structure and made sure to stock the sprawling plains around us with food for them to eat. She set down the bucket, then jumped away as the huge awkward teen griffons all clambered for it at the same time. Shaking her head at them she wrapped her small frame against mine, “I’ve missed you.”

Feeling the warmth of her, her scent filling my nostrils brought a growl from me. The kids were distracted, no one would even know… so I lifted her hips and had her against the wall a moment later, tongue entwined with mine, the most satisfying little moans escaping as she gasped.

* * *

**Arya POV**

The Apothecary shop had most of what I needed. Kieran has been really into brewing potions and had quite a list of ingredients for me. Lei, Kieran and I had been staying for the past 6 months in a small farmstead in Antiva. Kieran came into his powers and we needed a safe place to teach him. He has grown into quite the arcane warrior, a pleasant mix of both his parents I think. Lei has taught him about brewing potions and poisons and magical concoctions of various types. Our quaint place hosts many a gathering of bards and spies and politicians alike, Kieran has learned what to do and what not to do from the best. Now it was time for him to take the next step in his journey, we were packing up and making our way back to Ferelden, so he can take his place on the throne.

Since the three of us left, we have not been back to Skyhold. Instead we have been out among the people, helping them rebuild the mess left by Corypheus with our own hands, blood and yes even tears. Lei and I have fallen into a relationship, deeper and more intimate than I knew was possible. We are lovers yes, but we are also best friends, mothers, women, survivors, it’s a connection born from empathy, compassion, understanding, and intuition. Now, it is all coming to an end, Lei will become Divine Victoria, she will be out of reach but never out of my heart. She will be an amazing leader and I can’t wait to see the changes she implements into a world desperately seeking growth and change. It is a solemn good bye but also a happy next step.

It smelled of rosemary and ram when I made it home from the city. “Ari!” Kieran called, bounding toward me as he does.

“Did you get the….”

“Yes,”

“How about….”

“Yep, and even that one thing…” I told him with a wink

He wrapped his arms around me, his head coming past my chin now, he was growing quickly.

“Food is ready!” Lei called, “you got back just in time.”

We sat and enjoyed the fried rosemary potatoes and ram meat together for what might be the last time.

“What will happen to our home?” Kieran asked

“My brother Nikolai will be moving in with his new wife, they will love it just as we have,” I told him.

Believe it or not, my little brother married Josie’s youngest sister Yvette. They met at a soiree held by my mother’s family and fell head over heels for each other… Apparently it was quite a scandalous night, the two unable to keep their paws off each other. It was only after they had been courting for a few months that we realized the connection. Josie was opposed at first, foreseeing a much greater life than a farmstead in the country for her little sister, but once she saw them together, she knew their love was true. Yvette’s free spirit will be happier here, where she can roam, play music and paint to her hearts content. Besides, for a farmstead, the estate is on the luxurious side.

“Your Worship, carriage approaching,” called our steward Henrik.

“That’s probably them now,” I said, “let’s go say hi.”

* * *

**Cullen POV**

The first thing I felt as conscious returned was magic, thick and strong. I sat up quickly, ready to attack…

A gentle hand rested on my shoulder, soft but powerful magic sat dormant just under the surface. My gaze followed the delicate fingers, up a slender arm and finally resting on a familiar face.

“I…uh… ummm…where…”

“Hi Cullen,” she said, smile bringing light into the dim room and her giggle bouncing off the walls.

“Solona?” I questioned, unsure if I was seeing straight

“Of course, silly,” she said tossing a pillow gently at my face, “who else could it …. oh… right… her,” she cut off her own sentence, bitterness in her voice.

“Sorry if you are disappointed, Cullen, it’s just me and you are at Weisshaupt. I assume you are here looking for Alistair?” she continued

“Alistair is here!?” after we hadn’t heard from him and Leliana’s scouts never found him, I had assumed the worse.

“Yes… you didn’t know he was here, it’s been a couple years?” she questioned, “I expected better from Leliana.”

This was wonderful news! Arya would be so pleased to know he was still alive! Then, it hit me… he’s been here all along, why didn’t he return to help fight? Maybe he didn’t want to…? I don’t claim to like the guy but I did believe his feelings for Arya were sincere.

“You look confused…” she stated, cocking her head to the side, “Are you wondering why he didn’t return to your Inquisitor or to fight when the sky tore open?”

“Yes… you knew the breach had opened again?”

“Of course, a huge hole in the sky, we saw that all the way out here. We’ve just been busy, doing Warden stuff,” she shrugged, “You can ask him yourself.”

And as if on cue, he walked through the door.


	2. Is this Regret?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Current realities, past choices, and old feelings come to rear their heads.

* * *

**Leliana POV**

“How about you help Nikolai and Yvette get settled in,” I said once we had finished eating. “Sure!” Kieran exclaimed before he jumped up and headed outside.

Arya’s eyes met mine and I could tell by the dark hue to them that she was thinking the same thing I was. She stood, pulling her cotton dress over her chestnut hair and tossed it at me before running toward the bedroom. Warm skin, the smell of Andraste’s Grace, and soft lips enveloped me. Her fingers curled in my hair as I lowered my lips to the slick core of her beautiful body. It didn’t take long before she was quivering on the edge for me. Raising myself up I positioned myself between her hips, her juices mixing with my own as we moved. She wound her hands in her long curls, back arched, grinding herself as hard as she could against me. My climax arose as I watched her taut nipples bounce, Maker she was an amazing creature. We came then, hard and together. She pulled me against her chest, as our heart rates slowed.

* * *

**Alistair POV**

I had been in the First Warden’s estate in the city, not surprisingly he has taken an interest in Solona. He wants her to come stay in the city, be part of court. But she seems so happy here, among the ancient halls, they are part of her now. How am I supposed to ask her to go back to the city? I was musing in my room when a knock came to the door. “Messere, there is a man here, Commander Cullen of the Inquisition.” Cullen? That named sounded familiar, like a distant echo… the Inquisition?

“Thank you,” I told the servant, taking the small paper she was holding out to me. As I ran my fingers along the seal, images flashed into my head, a table with a map upon it, people talking of war and a smiling face that swelled my heart when I saw it. The girl was young, she had a bright smile and eyes that shined liked sapphires, she looked a lot like Solona but there was something different about her, softer, I felt this sudden urge to protect her. Her features twisted into pain as she held her hand up revealing a glowing green gash across her palm. It throbbed, pulsing to a silent beat of its own. Another knock, “Sir, the man is awake.”

I cracked the wax seal, opening up a message written in fine handwriting,

_I, Commander Cullen of the Inquisition call upon our Grey Warden allies to join us at the Exalted Council. Inquisitor Trevelyan, will be addressing the council around the future of the Inquisition in two-months time at the Winter Palace in Halamshirel. We call on you to join us at Skyhold as soon as you can._

_Commander Cullen Rutherford_

Another memory, this time I bowed, surrounded by my brethren, at the feet of the young girl with the shining eyes. “We pledge ourselves to your Inquisition, we will not fail again,” they all replied in unison. I remembered the fade and the demon army, the darkspawn monster Corypheus. Myself and the other Warden’s, in return for not banishing us, had agreed to serve the Inquisition and it’s Inquisitor. This Commander Cullen was here to muster us to their side, as we had agreed upon.

I felt compelled to go, but what of Solona? She could not come, she needed to stay here, safe and happy. Message and sword in hand, I made my way to the Commander.

* * *

**Solona POV**

Alistair came through the door purpose in each step. Would he remember? He had decided to answer Cullen’s call to aid, I knew he would. He held himself in the righteous, I will keep my word, way.

“Commander,” he said, taking a knee at Cullen’s bedside, “I, Alistair Therin will hold to my word and assist your Inquisition for this Exalted Council.”

Cullen’s look of bewilderness was stark as he looked between myself and the man, now crouching at his bedside.

“I must admit, Sir, that many Wardens have not been here for some time, However, I assure you I will gather the largest group I can,” Alistair continued.

At least I know he doesn’t remember….

Cullen silently nodded, dumbstruck…

“Solona? May I speak to you privately?” Alistair asked, turning his gaze to me.

“Excuse me Commander,” I said, “I will be back shortly.”

“You know I must go with him, I gave my word, and that of the Wardens,” he said

“Of course, Alistair, but you will come back?” I asked looking up at him through my long lashes.

He placed his thumb beneath my chin, lifting gently before meeting my lips in a tender kiss. I allowed my hands to wrap around his shoulders, pulling him tighter… closure and deepening the kiss. A groan sounded deep in his chest, right before he lifted my hips grinding his hardness against my core. I undid his breeches, freeing the length of him. With a skilled hand, he slid my smalls aside, just far enough to slide himself deep inside. He moved slowly, moans of pleasure as every inch of him moved within me. Reaching my hand to my clit I started rubbing it, I wanted to cum quick and hard and I wanted Cullen to hear it all. I imagined him rubbing his calloused hand up and down his cock, purple with need, as he listened. The catch of his breathing as the pleasure grew, his pace increasing, toes curling and the growl as he exploded his need for me into his fist. The image in my head and the friction building between Alistair and I had me edging after only moments. “I’m cumming Alistair,” I whispered throatily against his cheek, my core convulsing as he filled me with his hot seed.

* * *

**Arya POV**

Denerim was wet and cold, I had forgotten the constant dampness of Ferelden. After basking in the warmth of Antiva, this was awful. I had myself wrapped up in furs, despite it being late Spring. The market place was bustling and I found myself perusing the wares.

“Poor thing,” came an Orlesian voice, “you look positively miserable.” Her kind but demeaning tone reminded me of Viv.

“I’m freezing,“ I told her, “Where can I find suitable clothing around here?”

“Ah, you are Antivan?” I recognize the accent, she smiled.

I wasn’t going to tell her no, best she not know who I really am.

“Tell me dear, what brings an Antivan rose to Denerim?” the woman asked, putting her arm across my shoulders.

“I am a guest of the Regent,” I told her, “I have an audience this evening.”

“Well, let me help you get ready then my dear, come now,” she said leading me into a nearby shop.

* * *

**Solona POV**

I sat on the edge of the bed we had shared for the last year and a half, watching as Alistair packed. He was nervous, I could tell by the slight catch whenever he’d take in a deep breath.

A breeze came through the open window, blowing his smoky scent toward me. I was going to miss him. I knew he wouldn’t return, at least not in a friendly way. The fog would lift from his mind once he was out of range and he would be angry with me… he should be angry with me… I deserve it.

When we first arrived here, all those months ago, my powers were unknown to me and to everyone else. I didn’t intentionally make him forget, my inner desire to be with him again… like before… when he was all mine and I was all his…. It projected outward, using the taint within him to control, causing him to forget… forget the Inquisition, forget her.

Eventually, the old Warden Mage Antonin, figured it out… Avernus’ potion gave me power over the taint, as I grew more powerful this power also grew. First, it was the taint within myself. After my extended stay in the Deep Roads, it was controlling the taint in darkspawn and other blighted creatures. When Corypheus tried using the blight to control all of us, it set something off within me, I never heard his fake Calling, my own power matched his. I started being able to control the taint within other Wardens and shortly thereafter the Warden fortress, the griffons. I learned to channel my power to nurture, to push life back into this desolate place.

In learning this, I also learned my inner most self was controlling Alistair, fogging his mind against anything that could lead to thoughts of her. Antonin, practiced with me until I could control it, I should have told Alistair then, told the truth and let him choose what he really wanted but I didn’t… I knew he’d pick her and I didn’t want to lose him.

He ran his fingers through his reddish brown locks, looking at the pile he had set aside to pack. I handed him his soft leather saddle bags, in the side pocket I stashed all the letters she had sent since he left her. Antonin saved them all, even after many attempts to get Alistair to read them; which he never did, he’d simple set them down and forget. Antonin had kept all the letters, from Denerim, the Inquisition, even Emperor Gaspard.

He put in the clothes, potions, blade oil, writing pad, bag of coin and the griffon feather I had given him… then he looked at me with sad eyes.

“Solona,” he started, “The First Warden would like you to join him at court in the city.” He handed me a rolled parchment with the familiar griffon symbol of the Wardens.

I knew this was coming, First Warden Mika had already called on me a few times for tea or lunch, and usually he came here.

“If you would like to ride with the Commander and me, we can see you safely to his estate?” he asked, reaching to my hands and pulling me up to stand in front of him. Raising on my toes I laid a gentle kiss on his lips. He grabbed my hips, lifting me and deepening the kiss until it was hungry and passionate.

“There is no way I’m letting our good bye be like that!” he said, pushing his packed saddle bag off the bed and tossing me onto it, “I want your last memory to be of us…. well…. you know… licking a lamppost in winter.”

* * *

**Cullen POV**

I was gathering the last of my things when I smelled magic behind me. Turning, I expected Solona but instead was face-to-face with an older man. He had dark eyes and hair that had long since gone silver. However, something told me he was much older then he looked. There was a weight to his magic, like the dampness of an ancient fortress that rarely saw sunlight.

“Warden Antonin,” he said extending his hand

“Thank you for your hospitality, Sir,” I answered, wanting to stay civil.

“Of course, Weisshaupt is open to any who wish to visit,” he confirmed, “May I have a moment in private?”

With a nod, I closed the heavy wooden door and offered him a seat at the marble chess table.

“Do you play?” I asked

A smile swept across the man’s face, “yes, yes I do.”

We played a few rounds in quiet contemplation, I could see his thoughts whirling behind his obsidian eyes.

“Griffons have returned,” he said it nonchalantly, as if saying, ‘the sun is out today.’

“Griffons!” I exclaimed, “How?”

He met me with his gaze and something told me I wasn’t going to like what I was about to hear.

“Warden Amell, she has the same power as that monster your Inquisition fought…..”

“What!” I stood abruptly, shaking the heavy table and knocking some glass pieces to the ground. The old mage, held his hand out to calm me. ”Please sit,” he stated.  
“She is not like him, she is a creature of the living, not the darkness… she has used her power over the blight to breathe life back into this place… back into the fortress, the land, the griffon’s…. she hatched them and has raised them like her own children.”

“That’s why this place is so vibrant?” I asked, “that’s what spooked my horse in the field, causing him to rear?’

The mage nodded, and took a deep shaky breath.

“What are you not telling me?” I asked

“Like that creature, Corypheus, she can use the taint to control or alter the minds of others of her kind… other Warden’s.”

He didn’t need to finish for me to put it together…. Alistair’s strange behavior…

“What did she do to him?” I asked, meeting the man’s dark eyes.

“Ahh, you are a smart lad,” he stated, “She has clouded his mind of you, the Inquisition and your Inquisitor. The memories are still there, she didn’t remove them, he is just not able to reach them.”

“That is why he didn’t come back? Didn’t help us fight? But why now… why does he come now?” I questioned

“I am unsure, perhaps having you here helped him access something… or maybe Solona is releasing her hold…. Whatever the reason, he remembers pledging his oath to the Inquisition and he will keep that pledge. Alistair is a man of honor.”

“Why are you telling me this?” I asked, although I already knew the answer.

“Once you leave this place, this land, the fog will lift and I imagine he will be confused and angry. You will be the only one there to support him and I need you to know what has happened. I did not keep anything from him, I shared the letters from the Inquisitor, Denerim, Orlais, your Spy Master, he would see them and set them aside, promptly forgetting they existed. Solona has put them all in his pack, so he can read them, when his mind in clear."

“Why?” doesn’t she want him to forget?” I asked and the man’s eyes grew soft.

“Think back to your youth dear Templar, reflect on your choices and past. The people and negatives that came from you choosing what you felt was best in the moment. You know Solona, you knew here before any of us and any of this, you even loved her. Loved her to the point of breaking your vows to the Maker, the Chantry. You know that she is a Warden today because she chose you…. over herself, even over your relationship with each other….”

“What are you talking about? She is a Warden because she chose to help her friend escape and got caught,” I interrupted.

“I will tell you what I know but you should speak to her,” he stated. I listened intently as we told the story of Solona’s conscription, he had her version but also Duncan’s account of the incident. As if on cue, he finished right before a soft knock sounded on the door.

“Come in dear,” Antonin called

* * *

**Solona POV**

I pushed the heavy door and found Cullen and Antonin sitting over a game of chess.

“Alistair is ready to go,” I told them, “I will also be leaving shortly with Sir Gilmore.”

“Sir Gilmore?” Antonin asked, surprised.

Sir Gilmore is the next in line to First Warden Mika, he comes from Highever, and was apparently one of Duncan’s recruits at the same time as Alistair and I… but when Highever Castle was taken over by Arl Howe he was captured and imprisoned. During the battle at Denerim, he escaped and fled to Weisshaupt, where he took the Joining and has been training since. Around the time Alistair and I showed up, he was promoted to Second Warden, and has been at Mika’s side at court. 

“Warden Mika has requested my appearance at court in the city. With Alistair leaving, it will be nice to have a change of pace and scenery.”

Both men looked at me with bewildered stares and I’m not sure why. Then Antonin stood, “I will have the servants prepare your belongings, please excuse me.”

With Antonin gone, the room fell into utter silence. I kept trying to set my gaze on anything but Cullen, however, his golden stare kept catching me, until suddenly… he stood and pulled me against his chest. I tried resisting but he was strong and part of me liked it. Deep inside, that walled and locked portion of my heart began to warm. The part that always held a piece of Cullen or perhaps he always held a piece of it….

“Solona, I made so many mistakes, I was young and blinded by my love for you. The constant battle of my feelings and the Chantry telling me they were wrong,” he was rambling and as always, I adored it but I had no clue what he was even talking about.

“Cullen?” I questioned, looking into the golden depths of his eyes.

“All this time I held a grudge against Jowan, he pulled you into his mess and got you conscripted. I didn’t realize that you were bribed into doing it by the First Enchanter himself. Irving was a sick, manipulative bastard, he used our relationship to force you into going along with Jowan all to get that poor initiate punished, to seek some sort of Mage justice on an innocent. “

“Well Lily wasn’t entirely innocent, she did break her vows….”

“So did I… we! So has almost every Templar at one point or another!” he exclaimed

“Cullen, I don’t see how any of this matters now, why are you bringing it up? It happened, I was conscripted and if it didn’t happen then, it would have been you sent to Aenor when we were caught. I would have been given the Right or we would have tried to run, just like Jowan and Lily. We would both be worse off. Look at all that we have done, we have saved the world, twice. You command the most powerful organization that has ever existed in Thedas and I have brought life back into this place, even the griffons are back! Warden’s will once again be seen for their true power and it will be because of me!”

With his large hand he brushed my hair from my face, cradling me between his calloused thumbs, “You are right, Solona, we have done wonderful things, and although there is a part of me that will always wonder what we could have been, if things were different; I don’t regret the path I have taken. The difference is that, now I know… now I know the truth.”

My stomach did flip flops as I watched his full lips move, I had a sudden urge to kiss him. Memories of our past filled my mind, causing my breath to catch.

He pulled away abruptly, recognizing the change in my body... “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply…” he stammered.

“No, I’m sorry Cullen, there is still a part of me that aches for your touch, memories dance through my head…” my words trailed off as I fought my body. It was so easy with Alistair, I just had the thought and it’d come to fruition.

“Is that why… the other day?” he questioned running his had against the back of his neck. He was talking about when I had Alistair take me in the hallway outside his room… I wanted Cullen to hear, I wanted him to crave me… to miss me… to want me.

I nodded my response, “I don’t know what I was thinking, I just… I wanted you to want me, to miss me.”

“Solona, I do want you, I will always want you but I am not the same man I was then and you are not the same either….”

“Why does it even matter? Can’t we enjoy each other without it being anything else or needing to be anything more?” I interrupted him

“I’m sorry, but I…. my heart…” he started rambling again

“It her, isn’t it, the Inquisitor, you still love her.”

He nodded, “I have betrayed her enough due to my own selfishness; I won’t do it again. With you… we have too much history for it to be ‘just fun’ we both hold part of the other’s heart and that… being that way will only hurt us more in the end.”

A knock rang behind us on the heavy door, “My Lady, are you ready to depart?” It was Sir Gilmore, “Our carriage is ready to go.”

“I will be out in a moment,” I called toward the voice, before looking back at Cullen’s molten gaze.

“We may never run into each other again,” I told him, “I wish you well and for Makers sake, tell the girl your feelings, make a life together, something away from all this darkness.”

“What about Alistair?” he asked, “once we leave here he will remember.”

“Alistair and I are tied together through the taint that runs in our veins, whatever path he chooses, I know we will end up together in the end.”

“Will it be truth or you controlling the blight?” he asked… fair question

“I have released all control on him, he may have started remembering already. My place is here, it’s rebuilding the Warden’s into something worth being proud of again; so when I leave this world there is a future for my brethren. His place is out there, Denerim… maybe, raising his son in Morrigan’s absence, that boy has a destiny outside of any of this worldly shit, I don’t know what it is, but I know it’s there. You should finally stop living for others and take the reins to your own destiny.”

BANG, BANG! another knock on the door, “I said I’d be out in a minute,” I called feeling a little annoyed.

“Open this door now!” Alistair’s voice yelled from the other side. With a flick of my wrist the doors creaked open. Shit, had he remembered already.

“We must go NOW!” he said, wild eyes staring at Cullen.”

“Alistair, what is it?” I asked

“How could you!” he spat at me, leaving me speechless, I had no argument, no justification and so I conceded, “I was selfish, I hope someday you can forgive me.”

With one last look at the two men who had simultaneously held my heart, I left through the wooden door and out of the ancient fortress that had become my home and sanctuary.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50200164002/in/dateposted-public/)   
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50199352358/in/dateposted-public/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Photo's of Solona and Alistair, they are from Origin's but I wanted to show some of them together... I imagine they'd be the same.. until he remembered.


	3. Regent, Prince, King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arya struggles with a choice, while Alistair hears some hard truths and Solona learns a new possibility she has never thought of before.

* * *

**Arya POV**

After my new Orlesian patron finished showering me in bobbles and dresses and shoes, she dropped me at the Pearl. “Not sure why a Lady like you would come here… but I ask no questions,” she said, “Good luck with the Regent.”

I gave her a hefty bag of coin for her time and stepped inside the Denerim brothel. Laughter from deep in it's belly drew me in, I’d recognize the sound anywhere. Stepping into a back room I saw my cousin, kicking ass at a game of Wicked Grace against a dark haired women, and two elves. The dark haired women saw me first, “new challenger?” she asked, voice husky enough to wet anyone’s smalls. Sybil turned her champagne head to me and almost squealed in joy, “Arya!!” she called, “Join us?”

I hadn’t seen my cousin since she had her son almost a year ago now. I saw no bundle against her lap, thus assumed the child, Carver, who she named after her brother, must be with his father.

With a nod, I took a seat next to a white haired elf, he looked at me with a combination of disgust and utter disappointment, “Must your companion’s always be Mage’s Hawke!” his baritone voice probably could rattle the table if he spoke loud enough.

“Oh! Are you a blood mage or a regular mage?” asked the other elf, a female with dark hair and green eyes that seemed almost birdlike, “I like to ask because I practice the occasional…”

“Merril, we don’t share that in public,” Sybil stated, kicking her friend under the table.

“Oh! That’s right, guess I forgot!” the elf… Merril, shrugged before drawing another card.

“Arya, this is Merril, Fenris and Isabela, friends of mine form Kirkwall,” she said.

“Isabela? You’re a pirate… right?” I asked the dark haired women with the sultry voice.

“Captain actually, Varric telling stories again is he… or perhaps you heard about me from your Warden lover, he’s unforgettable, if I do say so myself,” she stated, leaning forward, pushing her breasts even more out of her tight leather tunic.

“Oh, you like both?” Merril asked. Turning her large green eyes on me again.

“What?” I asked

“Your heartrate, it got faster, Isabela will do that to you,” she said, shrugging again

“Just keep your magic to yourself and we are good,” said the other elf, Fenris I assume.

“Well, if you are into it, I wouldn’t mind a roll in the hay with the almighty Inquisitor,” Isabela spoke in a hushed voice from across the table,” I’ll show you my cabin, if you show me yours.”

“Okay… nice to meet you all, deal me in,” I said feeling my cheeks warm and as usual, thankful for my Antivan skin tone.

**Kieran POV**

I made my way through the halls of the Royal Palace. Portraits of relatives from the past lined the walls. The servants busied themselves about but none of them paid much attention to me. Arya and I were to see Regent Eamon in a few hours, until then my existence was unknown to all but the Regent himself. Arya had given me common clothes, my potion satchel hung from my shoulders and to all those around, I looked like no more than a delivery boy.

I crossed through the kitchen, grabbing a piece of fresh baked break. The cooks were preparing our meal for later and it smelled delicious!

“You ain’t posed be here!” called a servant, as I paused to take in the smell.

“Sorry ma’am,” I replied, “can you steer me to the library, I have a book to deliver.”

“Library?” she raised a disbelieving eyebrow at me, “you new here?”

I dropped into a bow, “yes, ma’ me, first day,” I said pulling a tomb from my sack. She glanced at the book and humped, “I don’t care who ye are, just get outta my kitchen.”

Taking her word, I turned and walked quickly out of the kitchen. I wanted to find the library so I could read into the history of this place called Ferelden. I knew nothing much about it but would be leading it soon.

I had to dodge a few more guards but eventually found it! The space was huge but the inventory was lacking. There wasn’t really an order to anything and most books were from a Brother Genitivi and were Chantry related. In the center of the space sat a huge desk and at it sat an old man.

“Excuse me Sir, where are the books on Ferelden history?” I asked, approaching cautiously. 

The man startled at my words but recovered quickly, “books about the birth of Andraste, here in Denerim, are on the shelf there,” he motioned to the fullest shelf in the place.

“Actually, I’m more interested in the political history, Kings of the past, alliances and betrayals, the true stuff, not what the Chantry says.”

The old man looked me up and down, confused, “Where did you come from? We don’t get people in here often, and if the lucky pilgrim does make it past the guards, they usually want to know about Andraste,” he questioned. His icy blue eyes held a keenness, an intelligence I hadn’t noticed at first. For some reason, I felt like I could tell him the truth and that he would be happy to hear it.

“I apologize Sir, I have heard much of what the Chantry speaks and find it egocentric, unrealistic and to be honest, dull. None of it is logical or makes sense. I understand that for those who believe, it is a comforting thought and that many need the hope it brings to see meaning in their own lives or continue to strive to be better. That, because of this fact, it is important to respect its antiquities and traditions. I just don’t believe them, they seem archaic.”

“Is that so, young man?” he stated, “what do you believe then?”

“To be honest, Sir, I don’t know what to believe, I haven’t yet learned enough to make such a judgement.”

“A statement that holds more wisdom then you know. What is your name child?” he asked

“Kieran, Sir.”

The old man took a few steps toward me, rubbing his chin in thought. He circled me, eyeing me but somehow it wasn’t threatening.

“You hold yourself as he did,” the old man said

“Excuse me?” I asked, “I don’t understand.”

“Your father, you are Alistair’s son, are you not?”

“And you must be Regent Eamon?” I asked, putting it all together, I knew the Regent was an old man, who knew my father as child. I knew that Arya had sent word and that he was aware she would be bringing me to our meeting today. No one else knew of me, so there was no other possibility.

He started chuckling, “you are a smart lad, here allow me to escort you to my study, which is where I keep all the ‘true’ books.”

**Alistair POV**

I was pushing my mount at full speed across Orlais, I had only one thing on my mind and it was finding Arya. Cullen was keeping up, begrudgingly so but I knew he understood. We crossed the Anderfels, Nevarra and Orlais in record time. It was outside of Val Royeaux that my horse’s legs gave out. He fell and I rolled off, barely escaping my own leg being pinned underneath the beast.

“Shit!” I said pulling the water flask from my pouch and running it over the poor creature’s heaving sides.

“Alistair, you need to let up,” Cullen was saying, pulling his mount aside mine and jumping off. “This creature can’t ride any more, let me find a stableman in the city, we will get another horse.”

I knew he was right but I couldn’t get past the urge to jump a carriage and get to Skyhold. Only moments later, hoof falls came up behind us, “Agents of the Inquisition, Emperor Gaspard has requested your presence.” Cullen and I both turned toward the messenger with death glares, neither of us wanted to play the Game right now.

“We are not here to see the Emperor,” I started

“Just passing through,” Cullen finished

“I see,” the messenger said, eyes looking at the horse at our sides, “Nonetheless, it seems you require a new mount, come to the palace while we get a couple of our best stallions prepared for you.”

“How did you even know we were here?” Cullen asked

The messenger gave us an odd look, “Scouts of course, Commander,” he said.

“Forgive me,” I told the young messenger, “I am a Grey Warden, on Warden business, it is imperative that I make haste. I will take a new horse but please give Emperor Gaspard a heartfelt apology for missing his summons.” I pulled the Warden card and gave a bow out of respect.

“Are you also on Warden business?” the messenger asked Cullen, whose lips rested in a disgruntled line across his face, he did not want to go to court. His eyes pleaded me to get him out of it, part of me wanted to deny him, but I decided to take the high road. “Yes, he is with me, on Warden business,” I stated.

“I will send for two horses right away then, I apologize for the delay,” he said before taking off toward the city.

“Thanks for uh getting me out of that,” Cullen stated, rubbing the back of

“We need to get to Skyhold as soon as we can,” I said, making my way to a near by tree and sitting in the shade it offered. Once I sat, and the adrenaline wore off I started feeling the ache in my legs. Cullen took a seat next to me and I offered him my hip flask.

“What’s this?” he asked taking a whiff of the brew inside.

“It’s my vintage,” I told him, which just caused a raised eyebrow, “All us Wardens have our own… it’s a thing… you wouldn’t understand.”

He shrugged and took a long drink, instantly regretting the length of it. His eyes watered and mouth grimaced as he handed it back. I waited for him to stop sputtering before asking the burning question.

“Does she hate me?”

Cullen’s eyes met mine briefly before he looked down, I knew it, she despised me. I stood, pacing back and forth.

“I can’t believe I did that… how could I…. how could she… I shouldn’t even go back…” all the thoughts came spewing forth, my stomach churned.

“Alistair, Arya isn’t at Skyhold,” he interrupted, my self-loathing, “I…I…haven’t uh… seen her for over a year.”

“Andraste’s tits! Cullen! Where in the Maker’s sake in she?”

He half shrugged, half cocked his head to the side, as if pondering what to tell me.

“She’s uh been out rebuilding with the people, traveling with Leliana and um…. teaching Kieran.”

The mention of the child’s name, my child’s name, had my attention. “Cullen…” I urged, daring him to keep stuff from me, fist at the ready, “You better tell me everything.”

* * *

**Solona POV**

_I was running, in the distance I could hear their screams, the air smelled of death and sick magic… blood magic. Bodies lined the halls, Alistair and Zevran are with me, Lei stayed to help keep the children calm. I went from room to room searching in every dark corner, every charred corpse, every pile of templar armor, I had to check._

_All along Wynne was urging me forward, “We must keep going, we have to save the mage’s” she’s saying, repeating it on a loop. I knew it, I knew we had to climb higher and higher, but I still had to check, I hadn’t found him yet. He could be anywhere._

_“You’re wasting time,” Wynne was saying, “there’s no point checking, they are gone… all the templars are dead!”_

_She didn’t understand, she didn’t know. The rush of magic, flames licking my skin, a shriek screaming in my ears. Another corner, Alistair cuts one down, blood splattering across my face. “It was possessed,” he says when I glare at him, he didn’t even look, he didn’t even ask. Another room, another set of stairs… all around me the sounds, all around me dead templars… but not him, where was he!_

I sat up in a panic, cold sweat dripping down my face, breathing heavy, heart pounding, the rushing sound of blood in my ears. I was in an unfamiliar room, sitting of a raised bed with satin linen. I wasn’t in Kinloch Hold.

It had been years since I had that dream, Clutching my hand to my stomach, attempting to ease the nausea of that moment, those hours clearing the tower, looking for Cullen in every body, every pile of flesh. Before, it was a common occurrence, but since coming to Weisshaupt the nightmares had subsided, had dissipated. Why now, why were they coming back now?

“My Lady?” came a voice at the door, “are you alright, we heard screaming.”

“I’m fine, just had a nightmare,” I called, stepping off the bed and opening the door enough for the servant to see I was alive and unharmed.

She looked me up and down, “you look a-fright, my lady, let’s get you cleaned up,” she motioned to my white dressing gown, “you seem to have bled.”

I followed her gesture to the streaks of blood on the lower part of my gown, I knew what it looked like but since the Joining I hadn’t bled, I assumed it was a taint thing. I didn’t want to alarm them, so I nodded and allowed the ladies-in-waiting to enter.

“Please call on Warden Antonin, at the fortress,” I told one of them, “tell him it is urgent that he come see me.”

The servant gave a bow and stepped from the room. The others filled the basin with hot water and removed my soiled gown.

“Which oil would you like?” they asked, holding out a variety of scents. I picked one called “Into the Night” and was pleased with its musky but fruity scent.

The hot water eased the ache in my stomach and the warm milk they brought me to drink coated my throat, sore from sobbing in my sleep. I let my thoughts drift back to Kinloch, to the moment that changed my life more than any other. Finding Cullen locked in Uldred’s magical prison, his harsh words, and the moment I stared at the tower across Lake Calenhad and let him go. I sat next to Alistair by the fire that night, he had been aching to touch me since we met, and I knew it. His put his arm around me and pulled me against him, he didn’t question, he didn’t push he just held me.

After getting me cleaned up the servants dressed me in a fine silver gown, they braided my hair with blue ribbons and slipped my feet into matching heeled shoes. I looked at myself in the mirror, pleased. I couldn’t remember the last time I was dressed so finely, if ever.

“My Lady, Warden Antonin is here to see you,” came a voice from the door.

“Let him in, then leave us please,” I replied.

With a nod, they excused themselves; a moment later, the familiar face of my friend appeared in the door. His salt-n-pepper hair shone under the light, but his dark eyes held worry, “Is something wrong?” he asked.

“I started bleeding last night, Antonin, I haven’t bled since the Joining, could I be with child?” The question came out quickly, I had never thought about the possibility….

The worry dropped from his eyes and they filled with warmth instead. “Perhaps, not with child presently but you could become that way… let me check,” he said, placing his large hand across my stomach. I felt the warmth of life energy slip through my skin, swirling around my insides, easing the pain and discomfort, while at the same time checking… searching.

“Have you ever thought about being a mother?” he asked

“No… in the tower they give us potions so it wasn’t a possibility, sometimes they would just remove everything, and the Warden’s…. well you know what they say about the taint, so I haven’t.”

“Well, my dear, you can now start to think about it. You are not with child, but all the pieces are there, if you want to be a mother, now is your chance.”

“How?” I asked

“You control the taint, but no longer hold it within yourself, your body is going back to how it was before, before the Joining.”

“Does that mean, I won’t hear the Calling or have to die in the deep roads?”

“This is all new Solona, I don’t know what to expect,” he reached his hand up, cradling my cheek, “you are a mystery to us all.” 

* * *

**Arya POV**

Sybil and I walked up the steps to the Royal Palace. My heart was pounding with anxiety, I still hadn’t decided if I’d offer myself or just Kieran. Eamon had offered me the crown with or without Alistair and Kieran was still so young. But I have the Inquisition to manage and the Exalted Council was looming. Should I disband and come here, to rule with Kieran? Should I continue helping Thedas under the Inquisition’s banner? 

“Arya, what wrong?” Sybil asked, as I paused on the landing before the huge doors.

“I don’t know what to do, I thought when I stood here, it would be clear, the right choice…. but it’s not… I don’t know…”

“Your responsibility is to the Inquisition right now, you are still the Inquisitor, Arya. Until the Exalted Council decides its fate, your hands are tied. Present that to Regent Eamon, with a promise of a decision afterwards.”

She was right and I knew it but…….

“What about in the meantime?” I asked

“In the meantime, I will stay here with Kieran, Thom…. I mean Blackwall…. he is away on Warden business and it will be nice for Carver and I to stay here, in the palace.”

“You can call him Thom, I know who you are talking about,” I said, laying a comforting hand on my cousins back.

“Our little place, it’s lonely with he is gone, usually I go to Kirkwall, check on the Estate and Varric, but Denerim will be a nice change,” she shrugged.

“Boss!!” I heard the familiar boom of Bull’s voice from behind me, “Shit, thought I’d be late but looks like I’m right on time!”

I took a deep breath, with Sybil and Bull here in Denerim, Kieran will be just fine.

“Lets go!” I said opening the huge doors to Denerim’s Royal Palace.

**Cullen POV**

I sat under the shade of a birch tree watching Alistair pace back and forth, mumbling to himself. I had no words of comfort, he left Arya and the Inquisition when we needed him most. Arya held her pain with complete grace, never once did she complain, but I saw the hurt in her eyes whenever his name was mentioned. Thinking back, remembering, had anger boiling up within me, “what in Andraste’s tits is taking them so long!” I shouted, tossing my waterskin.

As if they heard me call, hooves sounded on the road, a cloud of dust rising as they came closer. I stood, that was more dust then a couple horses would make. As they got close enough, I saw the reason, Emperor Gaspard road along with a few Chevaliers and the two rider-less horses.

“Good day, Commander,” he nodded, “Warden Alistair”

“Good Day” we both replied

“What brings you out to meet us, Emperor?” Alistair asked

Gaspard sent a look of disdain toward the other man but recovered quickly, turning his gaze to me.

“Commander, any updates on the Inquisition?” he asked

“Your Grace, we are preparing for the Exalted Council, I have been tasked with tracking down our Grey Warden allies, hence my grumpy traveling partner.”

“Hey! I’m not grumpy” Alistair pouted, “just in a hurry.”

“Yes, I imagine you have a great deal of explaining to do to the Inquisitor? Nonetheless, you are in my lands and I do not appreciate being disrespected, I am not a dumb man, I know you aren’t on “Warden” business.”

Gaspard’s smile held a certain menace to it and Alistair’s, eyes turned dark with hatred, he didn’t like being talked down to.

“We apologize for our disrespect Your Grace; we are on a mission to gather the remaining Warden’s for the Exalted Council and are delayed on returning to Skyhold. What is it that you would like from us?” I stated, stepping between the two men staring daggers at each other, “If it is not imperative, I do request you allow us to continue on our way, we will be out of Orlais before days end.”

I was aiming for being amenable, but it has never been my strength, apparently not Alistair’s either. Gaspard gave us a smile, it almost seemed cat like and I don’t know what it meant.

“I have a question for Warden Alistair,” he began, “as an ally of both the Inquisition and Ferelden….”

Shit, this wasn’t going to be good, I hadn’t yet shared with Alistair that Arya was in Denerim, meeting with the current Regent to put his son, Kieran, on his throne…

Alistair’s eyes, narrowed and head tilted, “what does Ferelden have to do with it?”

Gaspard’s dark eyes found me then, “he isn’t aware?”

I shook my head, “Unfortunately, Warden Alistair has been in Weisshaupt tending to Warden business and has not yet been briefed on the current goings on.”

“Well… allow me to have the honor, Inquisitor Trevelyan is in Denerim, posing that her charge Kieran Therin, take over the throne of Ferelden. Since the late Queen’s demise and your disappearance, the boy is the legitimate heir. Can you imagine, at such a young age, being put in charge of an entire Kingdom? And so shortly after the death of his mother too… but alas we take our responsibilities when they present themselves, do we not?”

I watched the horror fill Alistair’s eyes, followed by hurt, pain and ending with fury. “Why did you not tell me this Rutherford!” he yelled

“If you would have stopped running toward Skyhold for long enough I would have,” I yelled back, “Maker, if you weren’t so lost in your own self-pity, you would have thought to ask but no, all you had on your mind was getting to Arya and begging her forgiveness, spouting your lies and trying to woo her back into your bed. The world has gone on without you Alistair Therin, while you were lost in domestic bliss, you son lost his mother, the women you claim to love waited for you, took on all the things that should have been yours herself but she cannot take the crown of Ferelden, because on top of all your shit, she is still the Inquisitor and the Inquisition holds the future of all Thedas, not just Ferelden. The world is bigger than your self-loathing and by Holy Andraste, I hope Arya casts you off like nothing, just like you did to her!!”

When I finally stopped screaming, I was drenched in my own sweat, and struggling to bring in air.

“And you think you are so much better, Rutherford, you cast her aside well before I did, you had her heart first, and it was only by your own cowardliness that she moved on… moved to me…. hmm… well… doesn’t that sound familiar…”

“ENOUGH!” Gaspard interjected, “I simply wanted to ensure Warden Alistair knew the state of his throne, and extend my hand as ally to Ferelden, once he takes his rightful place upon it. As for the two of you fighting for our lovely Inquisitor, I wish you luck and will see you in the ring.” With that Gaspard gave a bow and handed off the reigns of our new horses, “May the best man win,” was the last thing he said before he rode off into the now setting sun.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/49724614167/in/dateposted-public/)   
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/49710826852/in/dateposted-public/)   
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/49712579998/in/dateposted-public/)   
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/48741077856/in/dateposted-public/)


	4. Masquerade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some masks go on easy.... others not so much.

* * *

“This in unfortunate, Inquisitor, I had hoped to be free of this crown to return to my own family. My son Conner is about to have his first child you know,” Eamon, was saying from his place on the throne, “but alas, not unexpected, as I know your priorities lie with the Inquisition. Tell me child, have you heard anything from Alistair?”

**Arya POV**

Hearing his name, caused an ache in my heart, it happened every time I was asked this question. “He returned to Weisshaupt prior to our defeat of Corypheus and has not been heard from since, I do not know his intentions but I must believe that Warden business is what has kept him from returning,” I stated, trying to hide my doubt from both Eamon and Kieran. 

Eamon nodded, he was a smart man and sensed the pain I felt on the subject, “Indeed, the boy can stay here while you attend to the Exalted Council, we will name him Prince but he is not yet old enough to take the throne. Your friends are welcome to stay as advisors to the Prince and when I feel he is mature enough; I will gladly pass on Ferelden to him. In the meantime, if Alistair is to show back up, this responsibility will fall on him and he will be named King.”

I nodded my agreement, “Thank you Regent Eamon, the Inquisition will continue it’s search for Alistair and if we find him, we will pass this information onto him.”

“Perhaps, if you don’t mind my interjection, you should seek him out separate from the Inquisition, I know that that young man cares deeply for you, it may be that you can sway his heart when others cannot,” he said with a warm smile. Eamon was always a kind man, at least to me.

“I will take your advice under consideration,” I replied, my own guilt for not making the trip to Weisshaupt myself ages ago, hanging heavy in the air. I could have gone, we traveled through the Anderfels numerous times. I guess my own fear stopped me from going, my gut told me I wouldn’t have liked what I found.

“Well, since you are here,” Eamon’s voice had taken on a jolly tone, “I have called for a party, I do so love when there is opportunity to celebrate, and it seems we have much to thank the Maker for on this blessed day! Will you stay Inquisitor and join us this evening?”

I looked to Sybil and Bull at my sides,

“I’m staying anyway,” Sybil shrugged

“A party! That means ale!” Bull replied

I wasn’t due back to Skyhold quite yet, and honestly, not in a huge hurry to deal with all those memories.

“I would be honored, Regent Eamon,” I bowed

“Child, you need not bow to this old man, please take time to rest, our servants will show you to the Royal Wing, we will fetch you this evening. “

**Leliana POV**

I stood in front of the mirror looking at myself. Crimson hair falling to my mid back and blue eyes sparkling in the warm Orlesian sunlight. I had to let Leliana go, I had to become another. As a bard, taking on a new persona was like a second skin, with a thought I could transition easy from person to person. But now…. I have been Leliana for so long, I have learned and loved; cried and fought… I liked being Leliana.

I tried to think back to Dorothea when I had first met her and how she transitioned into being Divine Justinia. She was my friend, my mentor before, and after she was still those things but also so much more. I have wanted this, dreamed of this moment for so long…. Why did it feel empty now, as I looked at the familiar Sunburst Robes waiting for me to slip into them, slip into Divine Victoria?

“It is time,” came a voice from my door.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50241912798/in/dateposted-public/)

**Alistair POV**

Denerim’s familiar streets whizzed by as I galloped through to the palace. It was getting dark, my shadow casting long shadows as I passed the torchlights.

After our meeting with the Emperor I headed straight to Denerim. Cullen was right, Arya had been taking on my responsibilities for long enough and I would have her take the throne on as well, nor was it up to my 13-year-old son to do it.

Maker, Andraste, please let me not be too late….

Servants must have saw the dust cloud as I rode up because they were congregating in the front courtyard. Some took the reins of my horse, while others approached me with caution, they didn’t know who I was.

“How can we help you?” they asked

“It is imperative that I see Regent Eamon right away,” I stated

The nearby guards’ eyes me curiously, stepping over to offer assistance, “The Regent is currently hosting guests, do you have an invite to tonight’s gathering?”

Gathering, that must mean that Eamon is having a party, probably in honor of Arya.

“Phew,” I said dramatically wiping my brow, “I am an agent of the Inquisition, the Grey Warden representative,” I showed the griffon crest upon my shield, “I apologize for my late arrival, I had something to take care of in the Bannorn. If you could please help me dress, I’d like to join my companions at the event.”

They still eyed be, unsure, “We will need to notify the Regent before allowing you entrance.”

“No! There is no need to interrupt his celebration, here I have this document signed by Commander Cullen,” I gave my best smile, handing them the Call to Arms, with the Inquisition seal and Cullen’s signature.

They looked it over for a few moments, “Of course Warden, please follow us, the celebration has only just started, you will be with your companions straight away.”

I released a sigh I didn’t even know I was holding, as they lead me to the guest wing to get cleaned up and changed. Soon, I’d get to see Arya…. I didn’t know if that was a good or bad thing, but it was going to happen either way.

* * *

**Kieran POV**

Eamon and I were sitting amidst the guests, neck-to-neck in a game of chess. He was a formidable opponent, much better than the Commander back at Skyhold, but don’t tell anyone I said that. Eamon’s keen clue eyes watched my face closely, looking for any hint of my plan.

Around us people chatted and enjoyed the wonderful food. The celebration had just gotten started, so far it was dull in comparison to the ones Mother and I attended in Orlais. While eating for the inevitable drunkenness to transpire, I would put my focus in the game.

Behind Eamon a servant came winding his way through the crowd, he whispered something in the old man’s ear causing his expression to change from competitive to an apprehensive curiosity.

“Excuse me,” Eamon said, “we will have to finish this game at another time.”

I watched Eamon walked out of the ballroom with the servant, pace quick and body tense. Spotting Bull’s massive stature across the room, I headed that way, perhaps Ari knew what was going on.

“Where is Ari?” I asked

“The Boss, she hasn’t came in yet, must still be getting dressed, she likes to be fashionably late you know,” he said with a swig from the mug he held in his hand, “It’s the Vent in her.”

Not sure what the Quanari meant by that but I put my soviegners on him being the first to the drunk and disorderly part of the evening.

“Excuse me, Keiran?” a soft, slightly accented voice came from behind me. I turned to find an older elven woman, I had seen her before at Skyhold but hadn’t really spoken with her.

“You are Fiona?” I asked, which brought a warm smile to her bronze skin and hazel eyes, similar to my own.

“That’s right, I will be tutoring you while you are here at the palace,” she stated.

“You used to be the Grand Enchanter,” I clarified

“I used to be many things, that was one of them, yes.”

“I’m sorry, Ma’ma I didn’t mean…”

“It is okay, perhaps I will tell you my story someday. Inquisitor Trevelyan said you are curious about the past. Would you like to join me for a game?” she motioned to the chess board I had been sitting at previously.

**Arya POV**

It had been almost an hour since I was finished dressing. The servants had done a wonderful job, picking the gown and accessories. It was a dark crimson like blood. The heavy satin fit snug against my hips and breasts. My chestnut curls were braided elaborately and adorned with flowers the same red as the dress. I looked remarkable but for some reason couldn’t get myself out of the room.

“My lady, are you well?’ asked one of the servants from the other side of the door.

I opened it and she almost squealed in joy, “wow, you look beautiful!”

“Is Eamon waiting for me?” I asked

“He was, but he excused himself momentarily,“ she lent forward, to avoid others from hearing, “apparently there is an unexpected guest… servants are saying it’s the King.”

“What!” I asked, “the King!?”

“Oh, I’m sorry My Lady, I shouldn’t have… “

I pushed past her before she could even finish her statement. Hurrying through the halls until I found a few guards standing about, “Where is the Regent?” I yelled

The guards fell to their knees “Your Worship,” they said unsure if they did something wrong or not.

I took a deep breath, calming my pounding heart, Alistair was here… it all sank in at that moment, something inside me knew it was true. The same part that kept me from leaving my room. My stomach churned, spots filling my vision from the adrenaline.

“Regent Eamon summoned me to speak with him and the Warden, where are they?” I asked again, calmer this time, putting the mask in place.

“Of…. Of…. course,” one replied stammering, “let me escort you.”

The world was spinning a little, when we reached a closed door to a room I hadn’t been to before.

“Are you okay? You look pale?” the guard asked

I felt it, I felt like I was about to pass out, “I’m just parched, will you bring me some water, please?”

I rested my back against the brick wall, it felt like ice where my skin touched it. Deep breaths Arya, no emotions, you can’t show your pain, hurt, fear.

“Your Worship,” the guard handed me the glass of water, “Shall I announce you?”

“NO!” he almost jumped back at my abrupt reply

“I will let myself in, I don’t want to interrupt. You are free to return to your post.”

The guard nodded and clanked away down the hall. I stood there a while longer… if I could just hear what they were saying… but I knew if I used any magic Alistair would sense it.

I heard the handle to the door move, Shit… I couldn’t let him see me here. I moved quickly to around the corner, just as Eamon exited the room, shutting the door behind him. His face looked distraught, worried… his blue eyes looked up and met mine. He rubbed his brow and walked slowly toward me…. “I assume you have heard the news,” he more stated then asked….

“Is it really him?”

Eamon just nodded, it’s him and he’s a mess. I was heading to fetch the servants to prepare him a room but perhaps you should….” He motioned toward the now closed door…

My eyes started to burn with unshed tears… do not let them fall Arya… don’t do it….

Eamon’s smile turned warm, just as the hand he placed against my cheek. “You won’t like it, but you must do it,” is all he said before walking away.

Once Eamon was out of sight, I stepped toward the door again, the wood was smooth under my hand. If I opened it, he’d hear me, maybe I could fade step through without him catching it. With a nod in agreement to my idea, I walked away from the door, down the hall, around a few turns before stepping through the Veil. Taking one last big breath I stepped through the door. He sat with his back to me, firelight highlighting the red in his hair. His scent hit me next, wood smoke and the smells of the road, he had rode hard from wherever he was. He held his head in his hands, in the silence I heard small gasps of breath… was he crying?

I was overcome with an urge to comfort him, wrap my arms around his broad chest and let his presence fill me up. But I didn’t, I just stood there, watching him, maybe he’d hear me? I wonder what he’ll do when he sees me? What had kept him away? Why was he here? Why now? 

Next to him was a stack of papers, messages it looked like. He picked one up, reading through it

“FUCK!!” he yelled, crumpling the message, and throwing it into the fire….

Taking a shaky breath, I knocked my knuckles against the door behind me… I couldn’t stand here forever.

He stood as if coming to answer the door, but froze before turning around… “I forgot…. I forgot about you, about the Inquisition, about Kieran… I forgot about everything…. I had these letters, but I didn’t read them… not until just now….”

I opened my lips to speak but he held a hand up silencing me….

“I was in Weisshaupt the entire time and I didn’t want to leave, I was there with her, with Solona, and I forgot all about you.”

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/49838830698/in/dateposted-public/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leliana tarot card pic by quissus


	5. Conquer and Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alistair and Arya's reunion takes an unexpected turn, in more ways then one.

* * *

**Alistair POV**

The room was silent, after I finished my rushed, horrible explanation. Why had I said it that way? I should have just told her that it was mind control, not fully my choice. This was going to be bad. I wanted to turn the rest of the way around, look at her, touch her, tell her I’m back now and we can do all the things we had promised we’d do… but I knew it couldn’t be that way, it would never be the same again.

I could feel the silent thrum of her mana, like a breeze on the air, a slight disturbance rippling around the space. She hadn’t turned me into a toad, that’s a plus?

**Arya POV**

I wasn’t sure what to say, I wasn’t surprised, I knew his extended absence had to do with the Wardens, which typically involved Solona. I was speechless as to why he chose to present it in such a hurtful way. It was childish and unkind and I deserved a real explanation! I started to get angry, the numbness that came on at first burning away, leaving hot rage.

He didn’t even have the courage to look me in the face, but I could remedy that. I pushed my mana toward him, letting the fire inside me run with it, he would get hurt too bad, but he’d feel it. He sucked in a gasp just as my force engulfed him, he didn’t expect it or he could have dispelled me. The static cage circled him, white with my rage, it pulled him in front of me, forced him to look in my eyes. When he did, I saw fear, I could end him in that moment, all the foes he’d beaten, all the darkspawn, demons, evil things, it all meant nothing against my power. I felt an odd sense of joy start to fill me, and I squeezed a little tighter around him, a cackling erupting from within me.

“Arya,” he gasped, “I’m sorry” a single tear rolled down his stubbled cheek. I reached for it, let it slide onto my fingertip and watched it glisten in the firelight. In my head I was hearing voices, they were calling to me, whispering sweet words.

“We can help”

“Squeeze a little tighter, it will take the pain away”

“You are better than him, better then all of them”

“Arya, let us help, let us in.”

My eyes focused on Alistair’s hazel ones, the fear was gone now; replaced by something else, something softer… the joy inside me began to fade, a sense of foreboding replacing it.

“He feels sorry for you,” the voices were saying, “Kill him, show him what you really are, don’t let him pity you”

My eyes started to burn.

“Let us help you Arya, we will make you strong, just let us help,” this time the voices no longer sounded sweet, they were menacing, an evil darkness in my mind.

“Get out,” I thought to the monsters within, “get out!,” they clung on, dragging their claws against my consciousness, it burned, my eyes started to tear from the pain, my resolve fading. Then Alistair’s hands were on my face.

“Come back to me,” he was repeating, “Come back.”

How had he broken free? I lashed outward, casting everything away in one burst. Chairs, tables, Alistair, they all flew away from me hitting the walls and clattering to the floor.

Around me my emotions swarmed; a storm wrapped me in its comforting embrace. I liked the storm, the energy strengthening me in a way lyrium never could. I sat in the middle of it wanting to give in, wanting to become one with it, power, strength, might of the wind and rain, a force to be reckoned with.

Something inside me told me this wasn’t right. In all my years, I have never lost control like this. I started to panic, something was wrong, as my heart rate quickened so did the storm whirling around me.

Somewhere through it all I felt a stillness, it was coming for me, coming to take away what I had, sucking the mana from the air. I needed to run, needed to escape, it couldn’t take me, I wouldn’t let it.

**Alistair POV**

The change came quick, before I even knew what was happening. Arya’s mana thrum grew hotter, she was angry and hurt, it made sense for a moment before everything unhinged. It was as if something blocked her control, I could feel it, fighting against her resolve, taking her feelings and forcing them to expand until they consumed her. Her sapphire eyes began to glow, and she was talking in a language I didn’t understand but had heard before, from Anders.

“Arya, come back,” I held her face between my hands. Her energy had gone inward, fighting the demons, and loosening her hold on the cage she had trapped me in. I felt my words get through to her, her eyes focused on mine for a moment before the mana exploded outward casting myself and everything around us away from her.

I hit the wall hard, stars dancing across my vision, but I couldn’t pass out, she needed me. I reached deep inside to the powers I had learned as a templar, it had been awhile since I needed them, but they were still there laying dormant. I pulled them outward cloaking myself and pulling mana from the air to fuel their strength. Shielded, I was able to push my way through the tempest that was surrounding her small frame. It reminded me of the Storm Coast, except this was all confined to one area, at least for now. As I moved through, the storm grew larger, angrier, striking at me. My weapons were cast aside, not within reach, my only protection was the mana drain and barrier I had surrounding me. If I could only get to her, touch her, bring her back to me but the closer I got the harder the storm fought me.

* * *

**Kieran POV**

Fiona and I met each other’s eyes at the exact same time, the smell of mana was on the air, heavy and tinged in darkness. We both looked around, none of the other party goers seemed to notice anything was amiss. Whatever it was, it wasn’t happening here.

“It’s Ari,” I told the elven mage whose eyes matched my own. Somehow, I just knew it was her. We made our way through the crowded ballroom and into the hall where she grabbed my hand, “ready to learn how to fade step?” she asked with a gentle smile. I nodded, a moment later, we were in a space that shined and shimmered like a mirage against the desert sand. Every step was more than just a step and a few seconds later we populated in a part of the palace I hadn’t been before. It took me a minute to find my footing, reminded me of being off balance on a ship.

“The more you do it, the easier it will become,” Fiona stated, laying her hands against my head and pushing the green light of healing into me. My vison cleared and stomach calmed.

Through the door I could feel the weight of energy, the crashing of thunder and sounds of wind conquering an opponent. Fiona opened the door, we stepped into a tempest, water, wind, and lightning struck all about the room. In the middle of it all was Ari, arms reaching skyward, sparks flying from the tips of her fingers. It was beautiful and frightening at the same time. Within the storm surrounding her, was a figure, he was surrounded by a warm white light, as if Maker had cast His gaze upon the man.

Fiona froze, looking between the two as if unsure how to proceed. Jumping into the storm, I ran to Ari’s side, I wrapped my arms and mana around the one who had taken care of me as her own. Behind me there was a thud, I turned to see Fiona collide with the man, knocking him to the ground. Ari’s glowing eyes met mine and faded back to their normal sapphire blue. She wrapped her arms around me, we fell to the ground, the storm around us subsiding until silence filled the room. Ari’s arms held on to me, as if I was the only thing keeping her here.

“Something’s wrong, it’s taking my control,” she was whispering, desperation in her voice.

“Fiona!” I called, “Help!”

I didn’t know enough to fathom what was happening but the elven mage was strong and much older than I, she would know.

“What is it?” she asked

“Ari says something is blocking her control, help her.”

Around us the wind began to build once more; we were going to lose her.

“Inquisitor, has anyone given you something, a bobble or trinket that you have on your person?” Fiona asked, “I have seen this before, an item is imbued with a type of corruption spell, it amplifies emotions while at the same time impedes control.”

Arya was having a hard time focusing in, but I remembered her mentions a woman in the Denerim market.

“Ari, are you wearing anything the Orlesian woman gave you?”

She nodded, reaching down to her ankle, where a delicate bracelet laid against her skin. Fiona grabbed it, it sizzled at her touch, burning her fingers, b ut she pulled it free anyway,

“Alistair dispel this!” she called to the man who was standing behind us.

“Ow, ow, ow” he was saying as he held the silver bracelet, pushing his soft white light into it. The bracelet grew brighter and brighter until it shattered into a thousand pieces. As soon as it broke the rebuilding storm dissipated and Arya collapsed to the floor.

The man who Fiona had called Alistair barreled through us to Ari’s side. He pulled her into her arms, moved the hair from her face and just stared at her.

“This is just like when we met in Crestwood, come back please,” he was saying.

“Kieran,” Fiona called me from the other side of the room, “give them some time. Tell me about the woman from the market?”

“Ari said that when she first arrived here, there was an Orlesian woman in the market. Ari said she reminded her of Vivienne. The woman bought her some clothes, and shoes and jewelry, then took her to The Pearl where she met Hawke.”

“It was Orlais that I saw this magic before, it is used as an assassination technique. The imbued item boosts a mage’s emotions and blocks their control. Demons sense this from the Fade and use it to their advantage. The mage either succumbs to the demons, becoming an abomination; or they are killed by templars for the destruction their unhinged magic causes. The blame falls on mage’s being dangerous and no one thinks about it again. It is a clean and efficient way to assassinate a mage and reinforce a bias.”

“So, someone wants Arya dead?” I asked

Fiona nodded, “She holds a seat of power and most people aren’t going to like that, even more so because she is a mage.”

“But why now, and how did the woman know Arya would be in Denerim?”

“There may be a mole in the Inquisitor’s circle or Eamon’s, and the timing, well you have been traveling with Nightingale, have you not? She would have seen right through the marketplace scam; you and the Inquisitor are less safe with her being called elsewhere. People fear her but they know she is no longer with the Inquisition.”

**Alistair POV**

Everything around me had faded, all I saw was Arya’s freckled cheeks and peacefully set face. I traced the lines of her nose, lips and jaw with my fingertip. Her chestnut curls had gotten a lot longer, they pooled beneath, the firelight highlighting the red hues within them. She started to stir, eye lids fluttering a little, her breathing becoming less even. Part of me said I should put her down before she wakes, she isn’t going to want me touching her but the other part held on like she was the last thing on earth. Just let me touch her a minute longer.

The young boy came running from across the room, wrapping his arms around her, he must have sensed her waking. He laid his head against her chest, hazel eyes looking up at me. That’s when it hit me, this was him, this was Kieran, I saw it in his facial features, the set of his jaw, the line of his brow. He had Morrigan’s dark hair and lighter skin tone, but the rest was all me.

“It’s nice to meet you father,” the boy said, “what took you so long?”

“I don’t know, Kieran, I honestly don’t know.”

Arya’s eyes flew open, “Ari!” Kieran said excitedly

She kissed the boy on top of his head, “I’m okay, Kieran, thank you,” she said

“It was Fiona who did it, she knew what was wrong!” he exclaimed

It seems, someone is trying to kill you Inquisitor,” came a voice from behind, I turned to see and elven women, wearing an enchanters robe. She had copper blond hair and bronze skin. Her hazel eyes sparkled with joy as she looked at the three of us piled together on the floor. I unwound my arms from Arya and Kieran, to look at the women behind me, to look at my mother for the first time.

“In the sake of family reunion’s,” I said, “may I call you mother?”

The woman’s eyes brightened even more as they filled with unshed tears. “How did you…?” she started to ask

“An old Warden mage, enlightened me while I was at Weisshaupt.”

She smiled, “Antonin?”

I nodded and wrapped my arms around her for the first time in my life.

Behind me Arya and Kieran both asked

“Mother?”


	6. Destiny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The inner circle start wondering if they are seeing clarity or just losing their minds?

* * *

The four of us made our way through the dark halls of Denerim’s Royal Palace, heading towards the sound of music. When we walked through the ballroom doors, Eamon lifted his grey head casting us a smile, “I am pleased you decided to join us!”

“Lords, ladies and people of Ferelden, I have an announcement for you all!” Eamon’s strong voice filled the room, every eye turned to the Regent. I glanced at Alistair, he looked green, he knew what was coming and still didn’t like the idea of being King. His hazel eyes met mine, they were full of unspoken words and the question, “am I doing this by myself?”

Getting down on Kieran’s level, I spoke softly to the boy who had become like my own child, “Kieran, Eamon is going to announce you and Alistair as King and Prince, you will need to join your father.”

The boy nodded, he knew this was coming but his eyes held the same question as his father’s in their hazel depths, “will I be doing this without you?”

“I will always be with you and you will always be in my heart Kieran, I cannot promise what will become after the Exalted Council but I will always be here for you, even if I am no longer at your side.”

“Please show your respect to your King, Alistair Therin and his son, Prince Kieran Therin.” Eamon’s voice sounded above the hushed whispers and gasps. Kieran took a deep shaky breath and grabbed the hand of his father.

“It is time we take our place; our destiny has already been decided,” the boy said to Alistair, who pursed his brows in confusion but walked through the crowd to stand next to Eamon. The people of Ferelden took a knee, showing reverence to their King and Prince. The Therin bloodline, sat once again upon the throne of Ferelden.

* * *

**Solona POV**

Parties had become the norm of my life at court, I felt like I should be in Orlais, rather than the Anderfels. The First Warden spoke rarely of Warden business and had himself imbedded deeply into politics. Roland, who I started calling Rory, became my entertainment and release.

“Excuse me Ser,” Rory said to my current dance partner, a tubby, older man who smelled oddly just like the ham that was served for dinner, “ I do believe it is my turn to dance with the Lady.” His bright eyes sparkling with the mischievousness of his grin.

“Well… I…my dance has just…” the man, Lord Pence, was stumbling over his words all the while Rory grabbed my arms and elaborately spun me into his, leaving Lord Pence staring blankly at the spot I had just been in. With a few more crafty turns we were off the dance floor and making our way into the garden, giggling like school children all the way to a dark alcove, where our giggles changed to moans of pleasure, consuming one another like a sweet Orlesian treat.

I twisted my fingers into his red locks, tilting his head back as I rode him. The lines of his throat and jaw stood strong against the soft light of the candelabras, lighting the gardens in their dreamlike way. Using the bench beneath us as leverage, I put more force into my thrusts, his moans went from soft to growls of pleasure as he fought against my grip on his hair. Wanting to take the lead, he grabbed my thighs, standing as if I was nothing, laying me back on the bench. He pushed my chest down, sprawling me beneath him and thrust himself deep inside me. I could feel my tits bounce with each movement, his strong hands wrapping themselves around my throat and tightening, just enough to add to the pleasure of the moment. His usually light blue eyes looked black with lust, his mouth opened, head back in ecstasy. His silhouette against the dark sky and candles, a sight to be seen.

* * *

**Cullen POV**

Skyhold was a completely different place, it was no longer a half put together sanctuary for the lost. It was beaming, a functioning trade post and home. It had also expanded; it was not just the Keep any longer but the wooded areas around it had been cleared for farming, as well as homes. I guess the ancient structure finally ran out of room.

I walked slowly through the bustling streets, up the hill toward the draw bridge leading to the Keep itself, checking in on the local tradespeople as I went.

“Commander, please take some of this week’s berries,” came one

“Have some freshly baked bread from our own mill,” came another

By the time I began across the bridge, my saddle bags were filled with food, messages and even a new rune for a sword hilt. 

The training yard inside was full of new recruits, they all paused and stared as I walked by.

“Commander,” a scout came up taking my horse’s reins, “The Ambassador is waiting or you in the War Room.”

Wonderful, exactly what I wanted to do, go straight to politics. My back and ass hurt from the long ride, “Tell Josephine, I will come see her once I eat and clean up.” I told the scout who nodded before scurrying off. I made a beeline to the tavern, looking forward to some warm food and brew.

“Commander,” stated the bartender as I entered

“Get me the special.”

Even though Skyhold had grown, it still seemed empty without the familiar faces of so many friends. Dorian went back to Tevinter. Bull and Hawke were in Denerim. Varric was the new Viscount of Kirkwall. Arya was gone, Leliana now Divine Victoria. 

“He misses them, but do they think of him too?” came a voice from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. “Full but yet empty, what is needed to make him whole again.”

“Cole, if you want to join me just come join me, don’t talk riddles at me from the shadows, its creepy.” I told the spirit

“Is he here, but where has be gone?”

“Hey there bootstraps!” came a voice from behind me, Sera’s blond head poked around from the other room. “Need some company?”

I don’t know if I’d consider Sera or Cole company, but it beats being alone… or does it….

“Heard from her?” Sera asked, sliding onto the stool next to me.

“Not yet,” I replied, “she’s due back next week.”

“Did you find the Wardens?”

I shrugged, “I found Alistair, but he took off to Denerim.”

“Shite… he’s going to find her, isn’t he?” She looked defeated, “of the two of ya, you have my vote, if it means anything.” She shrugged, taking a huge gulp from a mug as larger than her small cherub like face.

“Honestly, it has been so long since I’ve spent any quality time with her, I don’t even know if I still feel the same way. I mean, I miss her and I care for her, but maybe it’s not like it was before. We have both grown and maybe that growing has taken us too far from one-another.”

“That’s the thing with growing, those heading to the same sun will eventual find themselves sharing the same path,” she said, with another shrug.

I don’t know exactly what she was saying, but in a way, it made some sort of sense… does that mean I’m crazy? I guess it doesn’t matter really, if Arya and I are meant to be, The Maker will make it so.

“Maker? What has he made? Thoughts, and dreams, actions… are the choices not our own.”

Cole materialized next to Sera, “is it the Maker who decides?” he continued to muse, gaze distant.

Sera let out a visual shudder, “Cuse me Cully Wully, I can’t take this shite, fucking creeps me out.”

“Cole, do you want a drink?” I asked the spirit boy, he turned his pale gaze on me but said nothing, just stared.

“Cheers!” I clinked my mug in his direction, taking the last of it down. Time to go see Josephine.

* * *

**Josie POV**

I should have known he wouldn’t come right away; he never did. I paced back and forth in the War Room, holding the most recent message the Raven’s delivered.

It was from Denerim, Arya was on her way back……

Alistair had taken the crown and Kieran was staying with him. ……

We didn’t expect her return for a week……

I hadn’t even prepared for guests. ……

It would be required to have a celebration for the Inquisitor, and it must be perfect………

* * *

**Cullen POV**

Josie looked a mess when I opened the door to the war room. She was pacing back-and-forth, fingering a piece of parchment between her delicate fingers, her hair was damp and beads of sweat rolled down from her temples.

“Commander! Thank the Maker! We must prepare for the Ball!” she almost yelled it at me.

“Ball?” I asked

Her body raised as she drew in a deep breath, handing me the parchment with the seal of Denerim.

_To My Dearest Josie,_

_My stay here at the palace has been cut shorter than expected._

_Alistair has shown up and will be taking over the throne and the care of his son, Kieran. I_

_will be returning to Skyhold straight away, by the time you receive this, you can expect me the next day._

_Looking forward to seeing you and Commander Cullen, soon._

_Love,_

_Arya_

She will be here tomorrow, and Alistair is staying…. That must mean they didn’t… relief swept through me, as well as a churning in my stomach. Arya would be here tomorrow!

“Why are you… how can you be smiling?” Josie asked sternly, “That gives us less than a day to prepare the Ball!”

“Why?” I asked

“Why what?!”

“Why do we need a Ball?”

Josie’s dark eyes narrowed as she glared, a look that could have any warrior shaking in his boots.

“The Inquisitor cannot return to Skyhold without a celebration. The people need it, she needs it, the Inquisitions needs it!”

I knew there was no reasoning with her when she got this way, and she knew far more about this than I.

“What do you need me to do?” I asked

* * *

**Arya POV**

The wind was blowing my hair, the night surrounding me like a velvet blanket, the crickets chirping and the fenic foxes scurrying from beneath the hoof falls of my mount. Although I had a small regiment of soldiers at my back, I could almost ignore them, if I closed my eyes. I felt an odd sense of freedom, my blood oath was fulfilled, I had gotten Kieran to his father and Denerim safely. Although I enjoyed having the boy, there was something about meeting that oath, it was empowering and surreal in a way.

Alistair was united with his kingdom, his mother, even his son, for the first time. After our encounter in the palace, I didn’t seek him out for further explanation, for closure. That also felt freeing in a way, like a chapter of my life was closed and now another could be started. Like a freshly inked quill and a clear parchment. With the Exalted Council only weeks away and a possible end to the Inquisition in sight, I had a clear destiny. I could choose what to do next, who to be, where to go. I would no longer have to be a figure for the masses unless I make the choice myself. Sure there was an assassin after me and I still had to face the Council but there was an end and I could see it’s light, even if it was still a ways away.

“Inquisitor, we are almost to the Crossroads, we should stop for the night,” came the voice of one of my companions. As I slowed my horse, I felt a heaviness settle in my limbs, I was tired and a rest sounded wonderful.

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50324620043/in/dateposted-public/) [](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50324620128/in/dateposted-public/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Picture is of Roland Gilmore (Rory), the Knight from Castle Cousland in Dragon Age: Origins, if you play as the human noble. Shout out to PerdyNerdy for the Roland Your Oats mod to change his appearance: https://www.nexusmods.com/dragonage/mods/5222. And Immortality, for the mod that makes him a follower: https://www.nexusmods.com/dragonage/mods/851
> 
> I like that his character wanted to be a Warden so bad, I imagine the survived the take over and made his way to some Warden's somewhere. In this story, he went to Weisshaupt and is now consorting with Solona!


	7. Hello

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arya's return to Skyhold is not as she expected. While Alistair regrets his inaction.

* * *

**Alistair POV**

Shutting the door to my quarters quickly, I slammed the heavy bolt lock into place. I needed time… time to think… time to process… since Eamon’s announcement a few days earlier, it had been nonstop meetings, court proceedings, clothing fittings, introduction of castle staff….there was even a promenade of women, lined up like a Tevinter slave auction, for me to pick as mistresses.

It was too much….

I plopped myself heavily into the leather armchair that sat by the fire. The hearth was marbled adorned with elaborate carvings of dragons and soldiers atop winged griffons. I don’t know how long I stared at the images before I realized they were Warden’s fighting an archdemon.

Had they installed this just for my sake or had it always been here? I ran my fingers along the detailed engravings, my mind floating back to the peace and serenity of the last two years. Solona and I watching Duncan and the others grow from hatchlings to massive creatures. Her laughter ringing through the ancient halls of Weisshaupt, breathing fresh air back into not only the fortress but all those dwelling within its walls. I know what she did was wrong, making me forget was wrong, but I don’t regret the time or the experiences we shared. Does that make me a horrible person? Am I bad? Should I expect some sort of swooping terror raining down from above?

My thoughts drifted to Arya; I had caused her so much pain. I had expected anger from her, spite but what I had seen that night in Eamon’s secret room was pure hurt. She didn’t deserve that, not from me, the man who promised he’d always be there for her. The man who asked her to love him, to give all of herself to him and promised to reciprocate that and so much more. I failed her and I failed myself, my word means nothing, my honor gone. And now, I am handed the crown of Ferelden, despite all my mistakes, despite my cowardness, I am now King… all the grievances of my past forgotten. Do I even deserve it? Can I somehow atone to Arya, to the world?

That night, after the party ended and the guests left, I expected her to come to me… not in forgiveness but for some type of closure, to hear my story. I waited all night pacing the halls, but she never came. I stood in the courtyard and watched her ride off, without even looking back. I should have gone to her; she was the wounded party not I… It was my place to seek her out, offer anything I could to ease her pain…

The ceramic mug of ale in my hand shattered against the wall as I tossed it…. Why didn’t I go to her? I waited for her to come to me, for her to come asking for what she needed… why Maker am I such an idiot?!?

Morrigan was right all along… I am nothing more than a coward. I bet she is laughing at me from the Fade… “dare I say more,” I can hear her voice echoing from the corners of my quarters.

* * *

**Arya POV**

“INKY!!” Sera yelled, as she vaulted from her spot atop Herald’s Rest.

“I couldn’t ask for a warmer welcome,” I shared to my friend

Once Sera called attention to my presence, the courtyard quieted. People stopped what they were doing and just stared. I didn’t recognize anyone in my vicinity, mostly recruits milling around the training yard, merchants at their stalls and common folk going about their lives.

It felt odd….

“It’s just me who gets to welcome you home,” Sera said, “most everyone else has left. But Josephine is in her study, she’s got some party planned for you and Cullen is here, he’s probably just hiding…. poor guys been even more anxious than usual since he heard you’d be back today.”

“Is she a hero no more... forgotten... monumented…. the world remembers but hearts are easily distracted,” Cole’s muttering came to me on the breeze, before his slender form materialized next to me.

I pulled them both into an embrace, it was a strange home coming but I was happy to see their faces. Upon release Sera rubbed her arms, “eh… no offense Inky but he still creeps me out.”

“fear… what does it me… truth… or lie,”

“Shut it!” Sera exclaimed at the space the spirit boy had stood only a moment before.

I stepped through doors to the Keep and found the main hall full of random nobles. Some turned their masked faces towards me; others didn’t even notice my passing. Without my usual heraldry, how are they to recognize me from any other. My clothing was even a simple riding tunic and boots.

Josie, however, stood at attention upon my entrance. “My Lady! It is so good to have you home! You must tell me of your journey.”

I opened my mouth to answer but she raised a hand, silencing me. “But first there are pressing matters to attend.”

Same ol’ Josie, straight to business, no time for small talk unless it was a means to some end task or political gain.

“What’s on the agenda, Ambassador?”

“Well, first thing first, we will need to prepare you for tomorrow’s welcoming ball,” she started bustling her way towards the war room.

“A ball?”

“Of course, we cannot have the Inquisitor returning home without a celebration for all our allies to see. Did you notice that most didn’t even recognize you as you walked through the great hall? We can’t have that; everyone must know you from the commoner to the King. We can’t have you appearing weak or unimportant.”

“What does ‘preparing’ entail?” I asked, making quoting gestures with my fingers.

“The seamstresses and tailors will be here tonight as will the merchants. I asked them to prepare an assortment of fine silks for you to choose from, in you chambers later….”

Cullen stood at his usual spot next to the war table, his broad shoulders bent over the map. Josie’s words trailed off when I met his golden eyes with mine. Time slowed, I remembered the first time I had seen those eyes through a metallic mask at the Temple of Sacred Ashes, blood pounded in my head and sweat began to bead up on my brow.

“Inquisitor… INQUISTOR!” Josie yelled, jarring me back to the present.

“I’m sorry Josie… it’s been a long journey.” I said trying to put her between Cullen and I, so he wouldn’t see me blush. Josie shook her head in disapproval, much like I’m sure Cassandra would have done.

“I will give you two some space, I’m sure you have much business to catch up on. However, I expect you to meet me in your quarters at promptly 7pm to see the tailors.”

I turned and watched her ruffled gown disappear through the heavy war room doors wishing she would have stayed.

Behind me Cullen cleared his throat. I turned and made my way to the huge table.

“What are the updates Commander?” I asked, reverting to the way we had left it 2 years prior.

“Of course,” he answered, “thanks to your efforts out among the people, we continue receiving new recruits daily. Nobles families in the Dales, Nevarra and the Freemarch’s have pledged to our cause. Orlais is also at our beck-n-call, thanks to Emperor Gaspard.”

“How is Gaspard?” I questioned looking up from the map for the first time.

Cullen gave me a warm, comforting smile, “He is well, in fact, I saw him recently when Warden Alistair and I were on our way back from Weisshaupt. He asked after you, and I believe is still awaiting your decision to be his bride.”

“Of course he is,” I said. I will always have a warm place in my heart for Gaspard,

“What was is like?” I asked, fidgeting with the leather tie of my belt.

“What was what like?” he replied

“Weisshaupt… Alistair… Solona?”

I heard him shuffle and before I looked up, he was pulling me against his strong chest. His smell surrounded me causing my lower stomach to flip-flop.

“Arya, I am so sorry… I know it wasn’t me who did it…. I… well… I generally felt Alistair’s feelings for you were true.... I mean... I didn’t like them… but… well….” he stuttered

Looking up from where he had me pinned against his chest put our faces close enough to kiss and Maker I wanted to.

“Cullen, what happened with Alistair was out of our control. Solona controlled his mind but he has always had love for her deep within, just like you. It’s not surprising, how things turned out. And now he is King of Ferelden and when his time comes, he will join her once again in the Deep Roads. As Warden’s they share something that none of us can comprehend. If he and I had built a life together, he would have eventual left it to return to her. I am thankful that this pain is happening to me now, rather than 10 years down the road. “

His large hand reached up brushing the hair from my forehead so he could place a gentle kiss upon it.

“I have missed you,” he stated, “I didn’t know what to expect, it’s been so long since we saw each other.”

The swirling depths of his eyes spoke what his words did not, I had a flashback to he and I standing amidst the battle at the Arbor Wilds. His eyes holding so many unspoken feelings. I wondered what he felt about it now. I could feel his body reacting to mine, but I had never doubted attraction between us. In the Arbor Wilds I had told him I loved him and would stand next to him while he healed if he would just let me. He refused; he didn’t want to hurt me…. ‘I will be with you only when I am whole enough to do it the way you deserve,’ he had said.

* * *

**Cullen POV**

Her sapphire eyes bore deep into mine… questing for everything I held back from her. Why did we always end up in this place? In the last two years I had healed, no longer was I plagued by lyrium withdrawal, nightmares, or fear. Cassandra and I had done intense reflection and deep thinking to heal the inner workings of my mind. I once promised her when I was whole, I would love her as she deserved… why then do I hold back? Was now the right time?

It had been a while that we stood there, silent, in each other’s arms. A choice needed to be made, we both ached to deepen our embrace but feared the implications of it. That in itself told me the time wasn’t right.

“Arya…. I….” I didn’t know what to say…

A smile crept across her lovely face and she began to laugh…... “we are quite the pair, aren’t we?” she stated, “hello to you Cullen, lets leave it there for now.”

The tension eased as her giggling filled the war room. “yes, for now, that is the best course of action.,” I told her, stepping back, and turning to the war table.

“Where are we at with Ferelden?” she asked

“That is an unknown, Regent Eamon stayed neutral, due to the state of Ferelden, he felt his attention couldn’t be divided. Now it will be up to Alistair to decide… as a Warden he is our ally… as a King… that is yet to be seen.”

“Tevinter?”

“Dorian has done well for himself since he returned, which I’m sure you are aware of. He has a large faction backing him but has not yet made it to the top of the Imperium’s hierarchy.”

“The Anderfels?”

“That one I was hoping Alistair could help with. Weisshaupt did agree to muster the Wardens for us but we have not contacted the Anderfels nobility.

“Antiva is with us, Lei and I spent a good amount of time with nobility there,” she added

“Wonderful, it seems the Inquisition has all of Southern Thedas backing it and most of the North, we should pose a strong front at the Exalted Council.”

She turned from the map, meeting my eyes again, “Cullen, do you think we should disband? Mother Giselle once told me that the real power of the last Inquisition was that when their time was up, they laid down their swords. Is it time for us?”

“We banded together to close the Breach and defeat Corypheus, we have done that but in doing so we grew into a symbol of security and unification for all the nations. But is that our role? Or should that be passed to the leaders, to the Divine?” I replied, not really giving her an answer but instead more questions.

“I don’t know,” she said, “when I think of the Inquisition being disbanded, I feel a sense of freedom, relief, maybe I could finally have a life of my own? But then I remember that I accepted this role, I took this responsibility on and we have done great things for the people of Thedas. I think of how it’d be nice to settle down, build a home, have a child, maybe even a dog…” her words trailed off… eyes on a distant thought.

“One of those Mabari’s, smart and strong but also gentle with the children,” I added, joining her in the fantasy, “My father had wanted me to be a farmer, like him, I used to despise the idea. I didn’t think I would feel whole without a sword in my hand and an enemy to fight…. I don’t feel that way anymore… I’d gladly lay my sword down, to hold my child in my arms.”

She looked at me then and smiled, her face held a hope I had never seen before. She had always held her own future at bay, the Inquisition was what mattered. Now she was letting herself think of a future without all this. In that moment, as we met each other’s eyes, shared our hopes, I realized we were not the same people we had been when this all started. Not even the same people we were 2 years ago, when we defeated Corypheus, when we saved the world. Yet somehow, I loved this Arya even more than I had loved the other.

I put my arm around her shoulders and pulled against me. She nestled in and together we stared at the map of Thedas, scattered with the markers of the Inquisition and hoped within ourselves it was almost over.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/49839671192/in/dateposted-public/)   
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50353365057/in/dateposted-public/)   
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50353207796/in/dateposted-public/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter but it seemed like it needed to end here.


	8. Babysitters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Preparations for the ball are underway and Alistair and Arya find themselves in the hands on others..... this could be good or bad.

* * *

_My Sweet Antivan Rose,_

_Your escapades have escaped me. I wish to only smell your scent, feel your velvet skin caress my own. In silver and ebony, I will find you walking the hallways of a dreamer._

_Forever and Always Yours_

A raven had dropped the message for me as I strolled the gardens. Sitting under the gazebo, I broke the double dagger seal and knew immediately it was from Zev. I could smell the sex in every curve of his elegant form, who would have thought an assassin would be such an expert with calligraphy. I had sent a note to my long-time friend after the attempt on my life. If someone put a contract on the Inquisitor, it would most likely be through the Crows… or so I thought. It seems that Zev hasn’t heard of any contracts, “your escapades have escaped me,” being our code for, “I haven’t heard anything.” The rest of it, I wasn’t sure of the interpretation, “In silver and ebony, I will find you.” Does that mean he is coming here? Perhaps for the party that is going to be happening tonight? The idea did help me feel more secure, with Lei’s cautious eye gone, a huge party was a good place to try another attempt. A repeat of Celene’s Ball, the thought made me shudder.

I looked for Josie in her quarters, the war room and the main hall but couldn’t find her.

“Who are you looking for?” came a gruff voice from behind me. When I turned, I saw Cassandra, she looked road worn, mud covered the legs of her leather armor. Nonetheless, it was nice to see her, she had been gone since I returned.

“Nice to see you too, Cassandra,” I said, with a little snark

“I apologize Inquisitor, it has been a long ride home, but Josephine insisted I be here for tonight’s soiree’” she said rolling her eyes

“Of course she did,” I replied, “and I am looking for her, I have a message to share, have you seen her?”

Cassandra just shook her head, with her disappointed grunt, “Probably organizing something.”

“Why don’t you go get cleaned up and rest awhile, I will tell her you are back once I find her,” I said, laying a hand on her shoulder.

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” she said taking a few steps away before stopping and pulling me in to a rough hug, “Happy to have you back.”

I watched Cassandra walk toward her quarters thinking how that was a strange interaction, I hope she’s okay.

That’s when Josie’s disapproving screech came reverberating through the hall, she was up in loft area. I have been back at Skyhold for a couple days and haven’t made my way up to the library, it’s all different now with my friends gone. We had visited Dorian in Minrathus but I missed him every day.

Walking through the side door, I planned on heading up there for the first time, but stopped in my tracks in the solarium. The walls filled with Solas’ paintings had once left me feeling comforted and in awe of their beauty, now they seemed ominous. The many eyed wolf stared me down, followed me as I crossed to the middle of the room. Where did he go? Since that moment at the ruins, I hadn’t seen him, not even in my dreams. He was eluding my attempts to track him in the Fade, as if the mark that had once bound us was shielding him. I lifted my left hand up toward his art, the mark crackled, sickly green reflecting off the walls.

“Inquisitor?”

Perfect, I had completely forgotten I was searching for her.

“Josie, I have something to share with you, will you call the council to the war room?” I asked

“Is it imperative that we meet now? I am in the middle of preparations.”

She looked frazzled but I needed to let her know there was a possibility of an assassin.

“I know you’re busy, but it is important, I will try making it quick.”

She nodded, “I will meet you there in 10 minutes, I need to update you on our guest list anyway.”

* * *

**Alistair POV**

Apparently, I was no longer allowed to travel anywhere without a parade of armed guards carrying the heraldry of Ferelden. There goes any attempt at stealth, ever.

I was traveling to Skyhold, I couldn’t bare the way I had left it with Arya. I knew Josephine would have a party in her honor, thus I insisted it was imperative that Ferelden be there, to show our support. No one argued with me… because well… I am the King.

I will say that even with the clanking of my entourage, I was thankful to get away from the castle. Never have I been so stuck, except maybe when I was living at the chantry as a child. Nor have I felt so alone, even though I was surrounded by people ALL the time, I felt more alone then my self-imposed solitude after the Blight. I had advisors and guards, scholars and priests, my own private harem…. which I have not used, servants everywhere, doing everything for me… it was exhausting.

“Your Majesty, horses approaching,” called one of the guards. We were nearing the Outskirts camp, our planned stop for the night, who could these be... bandits? Merchants? Inquisition soldiers?

I waited for the three silhouettes to transform into recognizable forms, once they did, recognizable was correct and I was pleasantly surprised.

“It’s fine,” I told the guards, “I know them, they are friends”

Jumping off my horse I ran toward them.

“Well... well… look what we have here, a King and a tasty one at that,” Isabela said as she sauntered toward me. I pulled her into a deep hug, enjoying the small moan she let out. We had met in Denerim during the Blight. She frequented the Pearl, Solona and I shared some lovely experiences with her, between the battling and being arrested. However, after the Blight, we stayed close, she was with me when we rescued my father and it was her ship that saved me from the Stormcoast when Clarel was chasing me. Our relationship always had a physical component, but we were not “in love” as I would claim to be with Arya or even Solona. We had a mutual attraction and found great solace in embracing it, but we were friends above everything else.

“We are about to make camp for the night, will you join me?” I asked

“Wait is the King of Ferelden asking to steer my ship?” she whispered

“Only if you show me the Captain’s private cabin.”

“It’s an Admiral’s cabin now,” her lips nipped mine just slightly upon finishing her sentence.

“Guards, set the camp while I catch up with my friends,” I yelled, thankful for my new ability to delegate the always enjoyable setting up camp.

“Fenris,” I extended my hand in a warm welcome. The elf looked me up and down ending with a face of mock disgust, “I liked you better as a drunk,” he stated with a deep chuckle before pulling me into a shallow man-hug.

“Wait? You were a drunk?” Merrill turned her large, green, bird-like eyes at me, “I just thought you were always happy.”

I honestly could never tell if she was being serious or if she was…er is… that oblivious.

“What are you all doing in Ferelden?” I asked, as we all took up a spot around the fire

“We were at the palace, helping the Inquisitor and Hawke, have you not seen them?” Isabela asked

The flames caught my gaze as I thought back to my epic fail, “I saw Arya… briefly…”

“Hawke said you two had a thing for a while… your face tells me it was more then just a thing… I mean she’s gorgeous, I get that, but you genuinely care for her… what happened?”

That’s the trouble with ‘good friends,’ they always know when something is bothering you.

* * *

**Cullen POV**

I stood at my post, across the War Table from Arya. She was fiddling with a piece of paper between her hands, while Josie went over the confirmed guests for the party… a bunch of nobles I didn’t know.

“You remember Fairbanks?” she asked

“He took back his family name and estates in the Dales, didn’t her?” Arya asked

“Yes, Lamont is his name., he will be in attendance. So will Emperor Gaspard, and our shared family will be coming as well,” Josie continued.

I loved how she tossed Gaspard in there all nonchalantly, she expected Arya to react but she didn’t, she just looked at the map in front of her. 

“Also Ferelden sent word, Alistair is coming.”

Arya’s head jerked up at that one, “Why is he coming?” she asked

“Well, as you know, he is the King of Ferelden and our ally, it is expected that he attend. You do not have to interact with him, other than a friendly greeting… maybe one dance….”

“of course, I will be respectful, as I would any of our allies,” she said with a nod.

“Arya, what did you want to share with us?” I interrupted before Josie went back to more guests. She turned thankful eyes on me, a smile warmed her face.

“While in Denerim, there was an attempt on my life…”

“WHAT!!!!!” I couldn’t hold it back, “you don’t think you should have told us that!”

“I am telling you,” she retorted

“Earlier, Arya, don’t be like that, you should have told us right away,” Josie added, “I could have set things up more secure, hired more people, now it is too late… let’s just cancel the whole party,” she said, tossing her writing board and quill before storming toward the door.

“NO! We will not cancel anything, we will go forth as planned, Zevran is coming, he can help keep an eye out,”

“Zevran! The assassin? You trust an assassin to protect you from assassins!” I asked

“well, we all trusted Leliana,” she replied… okay she had me there

“This assassination attempt, what did it look like?” Josie asked, “at least with that knowledge we can know what to look for.”

“It was a magical attack, a charmed bracelet that blocked my control and boosted my emotions, I could have destroyed the palace if Kieran hadn’t stepped in.”

“Ah yes, I know about this, some of the Templars….” I started but stopped when sapphire eyes filled with anger

“You used them on purpose!?” she asked

“It was a different time… I was… uh different…” not that that mattered, it was as wrong then as it was now.

“Leave it to the Chantry, a means to their end,” Arya answered disgusted.

“Well an end that will no longer be, with Divine Victoria on the Sunburst throne,” I added, which brought a painful grimace from Arya… a question for another day.

“As heart wrenching as this moment is, I must get back to the preparations. In the meantime, Arya, you will have an escort at all times, it must be someone within our circle, so either Cullen or Cassandra… speaking of, have you seen her?” Josie instructed.

“Yes, she returned and is resting before the party,” Arya added.

“It is time for you to get ready Inquisitor, so unless you want Cullen watching you change, I’d suggest finding her,” Josie demanded, as she bent down to pick up her pen and left the room.

* * *

**Arya POV  
** “Alright babysitter,” I said looking at Cullen, “lets go get dressed.”

“but… I thought …. well, “ Cullen stammered

“Cassandra is resting so its you and me for now,” I told the blushing templar, “Its not like its new.”


	9. A Ball of a Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guests are here and Arya is set to address her people for the first time in a long time. However, with the darkness comes other machinations.

* * *

Josie had instructed me to enter last, as to not allow the appearance of any other important people to take away. Thus, I now stood in front of the main door, about an hour late to my own party. My heart was thudding against my chest, it’s been a long time since I greeted the masses as the Inquisitor. I reflected back to the last time I stood in this same place, after defeating Corypheus, the people called and cheered for me. Lei, Josie and Cullen greeted me with open arms, we had done it, we had beat the big bad guy and the people rejoiced…. now it felt different, it felt forced, and superficial. Maybe we were done? Maybe the Inquisition has become another forgotten group refusing to give up their fame? Maybe it was me, was I the one who had changed? 

My instructions were clear, “wait outside the door until I open it,” Josie had said. Droplets of sweat slid between my breasts, the dress was corseted and pushed my modest chest up, creating much more cleavage than normal… the perfect valley for my anxiety to flow through.

“Breath, just breath,” the voice was a whisper on the wind, as if part of the shadows the clung to the Keep. I froze, fear gripping me… here I was standing alone, outside with a killer after me… this was stupid, why had Josie instructed me to do this, was she behind it? My thoughts were interrupted by the cool sensation of metal against my back, just under the left shoulder blade, a kill shot.

“You are being careless,” the voice, familiar but not, rode against my skin causing me to shudder. The slight movement brought a gasp as the blade tip nicked my skin. “Luckily for you, I like to play with my food,” warm, moisture touched me, licking up the spilt drop of blood, “divine,” the voice echoed once again, close but distant, before it faded away leaving me shivering, just as Josie peeked her head through the door.

“Now!” she said

I was still dazed when the massive doors opened, shining the warmth of firelight and the fanciful beat of music upon me. I needed to be aware, who was in this room before me and more importantly, who was missing?

“Presenting Inquisitor Trevelyan, the Herald of Andraste,” came the voice of the announcer. All eyes turned toward me, and a wave went through the room as people bowed or took a knee. I walked down the middle, nodding, smiling, and acknowledging each and every face.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50812235146/in/dateposted-public/)

I was so focused I jumped slightly when my eyes landed on Alistair’s hazel ones. He was beaming in his red and gold Ferelden garb; a slight crown of gold and rubies adorned his copper brown hair. “My Lady,” he addressed me, taking a low bow, and extending a hand for my own. Our skin touched and sparks ignited, just as they always have between us. His lips lingered on my hand, the smoky smell of him filling my nostrils, taking up every ounce of my attention. I thought we were done with this, my brain told me. With a deep breath and stable voice, I addressed him in return, “Your Highness, the Inquisition is glad to welcome our Ferelden allies.”

As Alistair stepped back, a hint of silver caught the candlelight, behind him a lithe figure slipped through the door to the Underkeep. His movement almost hidden except for the shine of silver hair. Zevran was here.

“Your Worship,” Gaspard’s voice pulled me from my thoughts, he was next in line for a greeting. “You Grace,” I answered bending into a curtsy as I would for one of his status, but he caught his thumb under my chin lifting my face to his, “as I have said before, you need not bow to me.” He lent in laying a kiss on one side of my face and then the other, “I have missed you,” he whispered before stepping back. “Emperor Gaspard, we are thankful to you and all of Orlais for your support,” I said, not being able to hide the smile his dark features and shining green eyes brought to my face. He had grown a dusting of facial hair and his dark brown locks were beginning to silver at the temples, making him all the more attractive.

A gloved hand found mine then, drawing my attention away from the Emperor. “Allow me,” Cullen said as he guided me the last few feet to the Inquisitor’s throne.

“Thank you, Commander,” I stated giving him a warm smile. He wore a charcoal grey doublet with black embroidery, tailored black leather trousers and obsidian riding boots. I wondered why Josie had chosen such a dark color palette for us this evening. His hair was styled but that one stray curl sat above his golden eyes. Before he stepped away, I leant in, “the assassin is here,” his eyes narrowed, the golden color flaming with anger. 

After a few more deep breaths, I turned to address my people, feeling much more confident than I did standing in front of the doors, only moments before.

_“Allies, friends, people of the Inquisition, we stand here today in celebration but also to acknowledgement. We have joined together, for the first time in the history of Thedas, we stood in solidarity to beat a foe beyond the world. We stood and we were triumphant!”_

The people cheered as my tone grew louder, more commanding.

_“Yet, as you all know I have spent the last nearly two years out among the common folk, from Ferelden to Nevarra, and I have seen that we may have beat Corypheus, closed the Breach and saved the world from being overrun by demons, but we have lost much. Our lands and our people still suffer, still struggle, the damage that was done has put its mark upon our world. We may not see it in our palaces, estates and cities but it is out there and out there we are needed, the Inquisition agreed to walk Thedas through this and we will keep our word.”_

Even as the words came from my mouth and the flame of destiny warmed my inside, I felt a sadness. I was not done; the Inquisition was not done. I don’t know what it was that still called to me, but I felt it in the threads of the fortress around me, the air we breathed and the mark on my hand felt restless… something was coming.

_“Nightingale and I spent 2 years out there, doing what we could lending aid, but we are only two sets of hands. Today, we called this gathering t o celebrate our joint victory but also to acknowledge that we all still have work to do. It is not yet time to lay our swords down. We ask you, all of you, stand with us, fight we us, lets finishing what we set out to do when the sky tore! The Exalted Council calls us to Halamshirel, and we will go, we will stand as a front for Thedas and for the Inquisition.”_

The room around be reverberated with the sounds of rallying from the people. Josie approached, laying her hand upon my shoulder, cueing me that was all I needed to say.

“Now, shall we dance!” she called out to the people and with that the group dispersed into drinking, eating, and dancing.

Josie’s distraction gave me the moment I needed to slip away to find Zevran. I dashed towards the door that led down into the belly of Skyhold, hoping no one followed. The hallway was dark, even when there wasn’t an assassin after me, this hallway creeped me out. What if it wasn’t Zev ? What if this was a trap? I could see the door to the Underkeep at the other end, a lone candle casting an eerie glow. I didn’t have weapons, nor would I be able to move in the boned corset. I turned to head back into the main hall but the door behind me jarred, shit someone had followed. With a breath, I turned again planning to dash toward the far door, but a hand caught me, pulling against a hard chest. A memory filled my mind, a warm summer night, smell of lilacs and sweet tasting kisses under the shadows of Val Royeaux.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50812238281/in/dateposted-public/)

“I should have done this before,” Alistair’s voice fell softly against my ear. The skin at my neck and shoulder erupted in a thousand tiny bumps, my body shuddered as he took in a breath to speak.

“I thought if I told you I had forgotten and let you think it was on purpose, that it’d be easier… I’m an idiot… will you hear me out?”

My body wanted to relax into him, but I knew I had to stand firm, “unhand me and I will listen.”

Alistair let me go, giving me space to lean against the dark hallway wall, now thankful for the privacy it offered. I knew what had happened from Cullen’s report, but I was curious of his perspective.

“We learned that the potion Solona had taken back during the Blight gave her power over the taint. The more darkspawn she killed the stronger it got until it consumed her. We thought she would die, but she made it through and came out stronger, able to control the taint. She, like Corypheus, can use it to manipulate those who carry the taint, including warden’s and even plants and animals. She has used it for good, to nurture, to make what was… better…it is hard to explain. Anyway, she used it to cloud my memory of the entire Inquisition, Denerim, Kieran, not just you. At first, she didn’t even know it was happening, she wasn’t aware what her powers could do but eventual she learned and continued, until…. well… I’m not really sure when but she let go. Over time the memories came back. She kept all the letters… about everything and I have been reading them. I have missed so much. I am sorry you had to pick up what I left behind. I am sorry I wasn’t there for you like I promised. I am sorry I hurt you, it was never my intention, I really did plan on returning and fighting the big baddy at your side and maybe ruling Denerim together.

My heart ached, part of me wanted to forgive him, pull him into my arms and taste him, warm and sweet. But Dorian’s words from years before filled my head, “he will always return to you, but in returning, that means he will always leave as well.”

“Ali,” I started, “Cullen...”

“Screw Cullen, who cares what he had to say about it,” his voice was raised, angry, “I love you, I have always loved you… since before this insanity even started, and I will not cower from you because of it.”

Grabbing his hands in mine I closed the distance between us, he calmed. “Ali, you didn’t let me finish. Cullen has already shared his report with me. Do you have anything you want to add that is not already in it?” I asked.

His eyes dropped to where our hands touched,” The facts are as they are, I cannot undo what has been done. I simply ask that you give me a chance, let me show you, my word is true, my feelings are genuine, my heart is yours.”

“I do not doubt your word, and I know you love me Ali, I trust that you would stay… for now…” my words trailed off, he pulled me against his chest. “But for how long? Ali, you belong to the taint, even if you heart is set on staying, eventually you will leave again and you will go back… back to the Warden’s…. back to Solona… that is your destiny.”

“Arya, I told you of this already, and you didn’t care…” he pulled back to find my eyes with his.

“I didn’t then, I didn’t understand, I am different now Ali. Then, I didn’t spend time looking toward the future because I didn’t honestly think I would be alive to live it… but now… now I am alive. I want this Inquisition business to be over so I can have a life…a home… maybe a family of my own. I know that together we could have that but for how long?”

“You are right, unless the taint can be taken from me, in 5 maybe 10 years, I will be gone,” his hazel eyes filled with tears as the words came from his soft lips.

“Why not stay with her Ali? Solona and you are destined to leave this world together. I know you care for each other, why not make something of the time you two have left… bring her to Denerim, let her help raise Kieran, teach, and love him?”

He opened his mouth to speak but another voice fell across the hallway, one heavy and Antivan.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50811494478/in/dateposted-public/)

“I do apologize for interrupting this most exceptionally heart wrenching moment you two, but we have an assassin to hunt and I’d love to show you what my trap has caught…aye?”

“Zev!” I stated.

“Zevran?” from Alistair

“Ah yes, that is my name…” the silver haired elf answered.

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50812234891/in/dateposted-public/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First picture is of Arya's black dress, for a visual. Then of course Ali and Arya, thanks to the KittenTails' Character Swap mod and lastly, fan art of Zevran that I felt was adaptive to 12 years after DA Origins, which I found on this Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/gambwing/dragon-age-origins-2-inquisition/


	10. A Ball of a Time (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dance continues and some are seeing a common theme.

* * *

**Cullen POV**

I was sweating profusely, she was at my side just a moment ago and now, now she’s gone.

“What’s wrong with you?” Cassandra’s gruff voice startled me from across the hors d’vours table.

“I can’t find the Inquisitor, have you seen her?” I almost didn’t want to ask, not sure what the seemingly more angry than usual, Seeker would do. I had these visions of coming across Arya’s mangled body in some dark corner of Skyhold. Her calling out for me but me being unable to reach her, lost in a maze of corridors.

“She is under the King’s guard right now,” Cassandra replied.

The King’s guard… who is she talking about. I must have looked confused because Cassandra gave out a grunt, “she’s with Alistair.”

“why wasn’t I informed?” the question came out more annoyed than I expected.

Cassandra shrugged, “Figured one of them would have told you before disappearing.”

I stared blankly at Cassandra, that reply was so unlike her, complete disregard to responsibility. Especially with something so dire as the life of the Inquisitor.

“Cassandra, what’s going on with you?”

Her dark eyes were angry when she met mine, a sneer on her face, “excuse me Commander.”

“You can talk to me!” I called to her back as she walked away.

“Commander Cullen,” came a female voice from behind me, “Would you care to dance?”

I turned to find myself looking into green eyes, like spring leaves and a mischievous smirk. “I mean, it seems you have been otherwise dismissed,” she pointed slender fingers toward where Cassandra had stood.

I couldn’t think of an excuse to say no fast enough, as she entwined her fingers with mine, “let’s go!”

This mystery woman was petite and slender, with rose gold hair that fell down her back in a single braid. She had small jewels pierced through the sharp points of her ears, they sparkled in the Keep’s low light.

“Excuse me but…” I started as she spun around facing me.

“It’s alright, you wouldn’t remember me,” she said. The tempo of the music softened, and she stepped into me, pushing us close.

“You sound Ferelden,” I asked, “Are you one of the King’s people?”

The elf shook her head, “Nope, I am from Denerim but not in league with His Majesty. In fact, I haven’t been back to the capital since I was a child.”

She giggled at my puzzled look, “you were love blind back then, Sir, but you once stayed up all night helping me clean up an alchemical disaster.”

That rang a bell, back at Kinloch Hold, there was a new apprentice, must have only been 10 or 11 at the time, she was reprimanded by one of the instructors and called “knife ear,” because she accidently knocked some potions off the table.

I smiled at the memory, one of the good ones from those days.

“You remember now?” she asked.

“Yes, Amethyne, right?”

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50878969673/in/dateposted-public/)

Her face brightened into a huge smile, “that’s right! I’m surprised you remember my name.”

“That incident had a big impact on me. You know I reported that instructor; he was relocated and demoted,” I told her, which caused her to laugh.

We prattled on through another couple dances before saying our goodbyes. I made my way to the drink table, hoping to ease a parched throat.

“Did she tucker you out or do you think you can manage another go with an old friend?” the voice was familiar but took a moment for me to recognize as Clara.

“Clara? Why….?” I started to ask why she was here but stopped, as that would be rude. The blonde laughed, knowing exactly what I was thinking.

“I am here with Lord Lemarque, we are to be married you know?” she answered.

That’s right Fairbanks had taken up his lineage and was now a noble.

“Married? Wow… that’s…. well… congrats!” I answered, which brought an odd smirk from her.

“Shall we dance?” she asked again, “it’ll be a nice way to catch up.”

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50878988378/in/dateposted-public/)

* * *

**Cassandra POV**

I leaned against the back wall, holding guard, as expected but my mind continued to wander. My journey to meet my fellow Seeker’s wasn’t unproductive, some were on board with rebuilding and restructuring some were not. After reading the Book of Secrets, my faith was shaken as well, perhaps they will also come around.

Seeker Nathaniel was …… his bright eyes bored into my soul, causing my heart to skip a beat and warmth spread through me.

“No!” I told myself, I must not mix business with pleasure …uh... I shook my head and made my way back to the drink table.

After downing a few drinks, I felt better.

I had spent time in the Hunterhorn Mountains, where I ran into an old friend Seeker Emery, she was disappointed to hear what Lord Seeker Lucius had done, as he was her mentor. However, she was thrilled to partner with me in rebuilding our Order, with full disclosure, this time. Leliana’s plans for the Chantry were yet unknown, although she did ask me to continue at her Right Hand. It was time for us to step back into our place, fighting for the light of the Maker. Emery and her colleague Nathaniel, helped to develop a new training program for new Seeker’s, our first few apprentices have so far, been making good progress.

“I hope to see you again soon,” lips brushed gently against my neck as he held the hug just a moment longer than what was considered appropriate…. my body shuddered at the memory.

“Whose got the Seeker’s knickers all wet?” came a voice from behind, making me jump back into the present.

“what are you talking about!” I exclaimed to the elf.

“Hah.. I know those sex eyes; someone has peeked your grumpiness’s interests.” Sera stated, making an insinuating gesture with her fingers.

I heard her cackle as I walked off, maybe I should go check on Arya and Alistair.

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50878971158/in/dateposted-public/)

* * *

**Zevran POV**

“I told you to be careful, that I would get back at you,” the blonde spat at Arya, “He would have been mine, but you just couldn’t keep you disgusting, evil hands off him.”

She seemed to be upset about a love triangle between her, Arya and the Commander… but was she assassin material? Her words were spiteful and grossly unoriginal, she had no tact, and wit as dull as chantry cleric. No, she was not our assassin but what was her role?

“Escort our friend back to the ballroom,” Arya said, with a dismissive swiping gesture.

The woman, Clara, shot daggers as she walked by, “You will see,” she laughed, “you will regret this.”

“So not the assassin?” Alistair questioned, a quizzical smile on his face, “I though better of you Zevran.”

“Alas, the lady was snooping where she shouldn’t be, she has a role, perhaps as a distraction?”

“The assassin is a man, he spoke to me outside of the main hall, before I entered… his voice was so familiar…. I just can’t place it,” she shared, rubbing the goosebumps from her arms.

“Clara said she was married to Lemarque, could he be the man?” Alistair asked.

“Maybe… but I don’t think so, I knew this person well, it’s hard to explain but I felt it in his touch.”

“It is highly likely that we are dealing with not a single assassin but a group, one being the ringleader and the others acting as spies or, like in Clara’s case, distractions,” I answered, “Anything else that you can think of?”

“Someone one the team must be familiar with magic, the attack in Denerim was solely magical in nature, and the woman I met in the marketplace, had an Orlesian accent... or at least used one.”

“We need to get back to the party before people start asking questions,” Alistair added.

* * *

**Gaspard POV**

I finally found her, winding her way through the crowd. She moved with grace and power, heads turned as she passed, yet she saw nothing. Her sapphire eyes scanned the room, landing briefly on this noble or that, for acknowledgments sake. She was distracted, looking for something. It reminded me of the Ball at Halamshirel, she’d make herself known just long enough to gain approval, then disappear. It seemed blatant and yet, others didn’t notice... perhaps I am simply more in tuned to her presence. I mirrored her movements from the opposite side of the room, then grabbed her hip as she dodged an advance from another. Pulling her against me, she let out a gasp. The smell of Andraste’s Grace surrounded her, a layer of sweat glistened at her neck and shoulders.

“Inquisitor, do you make a habit of being otherwise disposed at your own welcome home soiree’ it is terribly rude, you know.” I whispered into her ear, as I pulled her to the dance floor.

Goosebumps erupted along her arms at the feeling of my breath. Her eyes met mine, “Whatever do you mean My Lord?”

She let innocent disdain fill her blue orbs and a smirk grew on her face. I licked my lips in anticipation, I wanted to taste her.

“My Lord, we must keep up appearances, Josie tells me that rumors abound of why Orlais supports the Inquisition still today. Arl Teagan of Ferelden is terribly upset, he fears an invasion.”

“Ah yes, Your Worship, we hear that even Tevinter sends an envoy to support your cause, what will the lovely Inquisitor Trevelyan do? Will she lay down her sword? Will she use her vast army to conquer all of Thedas? Whom will she wed? and who warms her bed at night?”

“The Game is afoot, Your Grace,” she bowed at the end of the dance we had shared. “Please excuse me, I have others on my dance card.”

As she turned away, she left a small piece of folded parchment in my grasp _._

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/181858508@N06/50878968823/in/dateposted-public/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Photos in order of appearance:  
> Amethyne- the elf Cullen meets, she is the daughter of Lady Iona (from the human noble origin) orphaned in the Denerim Alienage, after her mother is murdered at Castle Cousland. Picked up by the Templars when she tried saving a dead bird she found on the ground. 
> 
> Clara- Her and Cullen had a brief affair during my last book, she was one of Fairbanks refugees (you get the quest from her to learn that he is a noble). Now she and Lemarque aka Fairbanks are married, yet she still holds a grudge against Arya. 
> 
> Seeker Nathaniel- I made him up to add some depth to Cassandra's story, she didn't become Divine and instead is rebuilding the Seekers, found the photo on Pinterest 
> 
> Emperor Gaspard- As mentioned in my last story, I see Gaspard as looking like Johnathon Rhys Meyers, thought this pic was a good representation of him watching Arya across the ballroom.


End file.
